As if women everywhere weren’t already aware of how little respect men have for them and their basic human rights, Donald Trump’s white supremacist pal Nick Fuentes boldly took to X on election night to declare: “Your body, my choice. Forever.”
Chilling enough in isolation (though it’s not the first time he’s uttered this harmful phrase), these words took on a whole new level of threat as young men and boys – in the US and beyond – started echoing this misogynistic messaging online. And why wouldn’t they?
After all, beyond Elon Musk’s platform (absolutely no conflict of interest there), the president-elect himself has been accused by at least 26 women of rape and sexual assault since the 1970s. Depressingly, an entire nation of men and women still chose to re-elect the man found liable by a jury for sexually abusing the writer E Jean Carroll in a department store in the 1990s. Let’s also not forget that he was recorded saying he likes to “grab ’em by the p***y” (“’em” being women).
And there’s our answer to men like Fuentes: impressionable, naive people blindly follow their leaders – so if Trump’s actions haven’t had any repercussions, you can see they would think, why should theirs?
Let’s be clear: if you choose to follow in the footsteps of men like “The Donald”, then you know exactly what you’re doing. For any previous room for interpretation when it comes to Trump’s views on women and his motives has been eliminated since his first term in the White House.
From his Supreme Court selections to overturning Roe v Wade and stripping women and girls of their fundamental rights – his position on women, our bodies and what he views as our purpose in life is now abundantly clear to all. He isn’t hiding it. He isn’t apologetic. And it’s only going to get worse.
Now, there will be those who say that teenagers making TikToks in their bedrooms and incel keyboard warriors aren’t dangerous – that, unlike Trump, they aren’t in control of policymaking and it’s all just youthful misdemeanour (“boys will be boys”, etc). Others will also argue that this is an “America problem”.
But the very fact that young kids are making threats of this kind at all illustrates how insidious misogyny is – and how emboldened creeps, would-be rapists and abusers the world over feel now that their deep-rooted hatred of women is being upheld and represented in the highest office.
We’re often told “safety in numbers” – but in this instance, that’s our biggest danger.
You see, rapists and abusers aren’t born – they are created. And as any young girl will tell you, these behaviours are present and encouraged early on, until the potential threat becomes an actual threat to our safety. We are well accustomed to “locker room banter”, talk of sexual “conquests”, leaked nudes and lists ranking us on our appearance or performance in bed – and that’s before we even get to the guys who prey on drunk girls at parties or slip something in their drinks.
So normalised are these attitudes and behaviours from an early age that they contaminate even our own views of ourselves. We question our every decision, our every move, our right to simply exist – it’s like Stockholm syndrome on steroids.
And I genuinely believe that’s the case for many of the women who voted for Trump in this election. I absolutely do not condone their choice – nor do I wish to defend them for it, but I believe the results speak to the internalised misogyny we all feel to varying degrees, and also to the lack of access to education and healthcare women have in the first place.
It’s especially true of those living in smaller towns and rural areas. When you are already isolated and cut off from different worldviews and perspectives, it is very easy to absorb the toxicity around you and become a product of your surroundings. It’s like an echo chamber. And without any outside influence and encouragement to improve your situation and see beyond your immediate restraints, you become indoctrinated; a mouthpiece for that cause – regardless of whether it serves you or not.
I can also understand why, frustrated by the outcome and feeling a sense of betrayal, other women have taken to social media to shun their opponents – or, in more drastic situations, wish they “get what they voted for”. But this is a very dangerous line to take. Women are already pitted against each other. Internalised misogyny exists – if it didn’t, Kamala Harris would be president. And by reaffirming this dynamic, we only stand to lose.
I don’t believe female Trump supporters being forced to carry their rapist’s child to term or them dying because of complications with their pregnancies will “teach them a lesson” or “serve them right”. I don’t believe that the only answer to all this hatred and violence against women is to encourage more of it. And nor should you.
Of course, the responsibility to advocate for our rights shouldn’t fall squarely on women’s shoulders and in an ideal world, we wouldn’t have a convicted felon with few morals at the helm of the most powerful nation in the world, systematically removing them.
But beyond educating our children and bringing them up to value women, as well as calling out misogynistic behaviour when we see it, to me it seems like the key to real change is coming together and trying to get those voters to see why having agency over our own bodies matters. Having a voice and a say about our own lives is essential.
Our bodies, our choice. Forever.
