“Will Donald Trump get into heaven?” I know this is a question weighing heavily on your mind right now. The current president of the United States is 79 years old, so we don’t have much time left to sort this one out. Trump clearly has eternity at the top of his agenda, having spoken on at least two occasions about what happens when we die. He called into a radio program called the Todd Starnes Show, which is a thing people listen to when the internet is out on their block. He waxed on about his military deployment in Washington DC, but also about the possible system that decides the fate of your everlasting soul. “There has to be some kind of a report card up there someplace, y’know, like: ‘Let’s go to heaven, let’s get into heaven.’ It’s sort of a beautiful thing,” he said to Starnes. He’s probably hoping they grade on a curve.
On Fox News, Trump expressed serious doubt he’s going to get called up to the big leagues of life after death. “I want to try and get to heaven if possible. I’m hearing I’m not doing well. I’m really at the bottom of the totem pole.” I don’t know who he’s hearing this from. Is there a Quinnipiac poll I haven’t read? Has Steve Kornacki weighed in from the MSNBC (sorry, MS Now) big board?
