It is a cast-iron rule of the comments-section era that there is absolutely no celebrity you can write about without some person dialling in to post a contemptuous: “Who?” Did I say some person? Forgive me: I think I might have meant some guy. Strangely, you never see a “who?” below articles about sport, as though the posters have somehow grasped that ostentatiously announcing that they have precisely no idea about Ousmane Dembélé is not some status-symbol flex, and could secure them quite a painful wedgie.
I am looking forward to catching my first “who?” about Taylor Swift on the occasion of her wedding to Travis Kelce, which is taking place – perhaps you’ve heard? – in New York today. Because of course Miss Americana and her NFL star fiance are getting married over the Fourth of July weekend. And not just any Fourth of July, but the 250th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence, drafted by Thomas Jefferson. (I know: who?)
