It's awards season. The Oscars are on next Monday, March 13 (Australian time). Love a good red carpet. The fashion. The controversy. The speeches. The possible on-stage punches. (Will Smith, remember that? Yep, already consigned to the nether reaches of our mind.)
Cate Blanchett will probably win her third Oscar for her role in Tar so, therefore, should leave the little gold man right on the stage and go home without him. No Vanity Fair after-party for that statuette.
Because, at the Critics Choice Awards in January, Blanchette, accepting the award for best actress, slammed the whole concept of actors competing against each other for accolades.
Somehow winning another award was crushing her very soul.
"It's this patriarchal pyramid, where someone sits up here," she said, waving around on stage her rather lethal-looking trophy for best actress, just getting started on this whole "Awards? Pffft!" riff.
"And stop the televised horse race of it all," Cate continued. "Because, can I tell you, every single woman with a television, film, advertising, tampons commercials, whatever! You're all out there doing amazing work that is inspiring me continually."
It's the lazy right-on-ness that come from someone who has two Oscars already, not from someone desperately hoping for their first.
What I'd really love at this year's Oscars is for Top Gun: Maverick to win Best Picture. Yes! It is nominated. Hard to believe, because it's not the usual Oscars bait.
It was a film that unashamedly sought to entertain its audience, specifically its target audience, all now well into middle age but who remembered, almost word for word, the original Top Gun which came out in 1986 when they were teenagers. ("I feel the need, the need for speed" was chucked around about four million times at our high school.)
Top Gun: Maverick is no obscure foreign film by a rising auteur, nor a worthy piece of cinema with a deep social message. Nup. Just. Big. Fun. And it made, according to all the reports, more than $1.4 billion at the box office. That's a whole lot of Gen Xers who could actually be bothered to get out of the house for a social engagement and not cancel at the last minute. Not having to talk in movies surely helped.
So, back to the 95th Academy Awards. After Maverick is announced Best Picture, I'd then love for Tom Cruise to bounce up on stage to accept the Oscar (he's one of the producers of the film, as well as the star).
Because I know he wouldn't agonise about winning. He wouldn't say he didn't deserve it. He'd revel in the victory and be happy and flash those famous Cruise chompers. He wouldn't say he was a victim of this or that. Or make any political statement. He'd just celebrate making a film that people loved. And wouldn't that be refreshing?
Of course, according to the bookies, Top Gun:Maverick doesn't have a hope of winning. Sportsbet has it in the middle of the field at $26, way off leading contender Everything Everywhere at Once, which is at an almost unbackable $1.08.
Cate Blanchett, according to the punters, is favourite to win best actress for Tar (at $1.80). So we're in for a good old tongue-lashing. And, possibly a recycled frock.
At this year's BAFTAs, Cate wore a dress she first wore at the 2015 Oscars. Because you wouldn't want to be contributing to the spectacle of this "televised horse race", would you? Forget all the times she was the ultimate clotheshorse for all the big designers at countless previous awards shows.
Wear a new dress, Cate. Celebrate the wins. Enjoy the damn Oscars.
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