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Evening Standard
Evening Standard
Lifestyle
Vicky Jessop

The best of the Great British Bake-Off: the handshakes, the bake fails, and everything in between

After ten nail-biting episodes, the Great British Bake-Off has finally come to a close. Over the course of three months, bakers went head to head as they tried to make biscuit towers, steamed puddings, delicate pastries and pretty much every baking-related under the sun.

But with great stress comes great drama, and Bake-Off was certainly not without its share of memorable moments this season. Here are some of the highlights.

Best outfit

(Channel 4/ Love Productions)

The undisputed fashion king of Bake-Off has to be Noel Fielding, whose colourful jumpers and crazy dress sense has livened up many an episode (week four’s blue and pink zebra-print shirt is a particular highlight). That said, Matt Lucas also deserves a shout-out, especially for the blue and pink (sensing a theme here) flowered shirt he wore on Halloween Week.

When it comes to the bakers, Sandro’s leather trousers have to get a look-in: he wore them for Patisserie Week in the hopes that they might help to win Prue around to his bakes. Needless to say, wipe-clean though they were, they didn’t.

And who could forget Janusz, who wore zebra-print heels in Halloween Week (his inspiration, he said, was Noel) to do his baking in?

Least bakey bake

As Bake-Off has progressed (we’re thirteen seasons in at this point), the bakes have become ever more obscure, and the themed weeks ever more bizarre. Some of the bakes barely qualify as bakes, such as the weird technical challenge in Mexican Week, where the bakers were required to make tacos… and Paul then judged them on how seared their steak was.

That’s strange enough, but Custard Week may just have trumped it: during that week’s technical, the bakers took part in a time-staggered challenge that required them to make ice-cream, as well as the chocolate-dipped ice-cream cones that they were supposed to go in. Somebody tell me: where’s the baking in that?

Best handshake

To Sandro’s fury (he has complained about this several times), Paul Hollywood has been notably stingy with his handshakes this season – possibly due to the vast number of tabloid articles complaining that he’s usually too generous with them.

That said, his double-whammy handshake all the way back in episode two might count as the best: when the bakers made macarons, Dawn got the series’ first handshake for her yo-yo design, only for Maxy to get the same treatment not five minutes later for her daisy-shaped macarons. Them’s the breaks: even Syabira has only had one.

Weirdest flavour combo

As the weeks tick on, the bakers often try out new flavours to impress the judges, not all of which work, bless ‘em. Of these dabblers in the baking arts, Syabira deserves a special mention: not an episode goes by where she’s not tried a weird and wacky ingredient out on a sceptical Paul and Prue.

However, two deserve special mentions: her sweetcorn sponge in Mexican Week (made with ground sweetcorn), and her orange blossom and white truffle biscuits in Halloween Week. Both of these went down like a lead balloon with the judges (the sponge was too dry, and the biscuits were apparently disgusting), but that doesn’t mean they weren’t worth a shot.

Oh, and Janusz’s Halloween Week creations deserve a special mention: for those, he made truffles out of ground crickets. Yes, the bug. And even more interestingly, Prue decided at the end that he actually hadn’t put enough crickets in, deeming it too sweet. Noted.

Most nail-biting moment

There are plenty of tense moments in the tent: after all, the premise revolves around people making insanely complicated things in a time-limited setting. However, the semi-final showstopper had to be this season’s most nail-biting moment.

Under the eye of the judges, the bakers raced to assemble their krokan (Swedish cakes made out of stacked biscuits) under extreme time pressure. The biscuits were delicate, they had to be assembled into metre-tall towers, and by the end even Noel and Matt were feeling the pressure.

“And we can breathe as well, now,” Matt commented, when time was up. Even more impressively: none of the structures collapsed.

Best/worst innuendo

No Bake-Off series is complete without at least a couple of unintended innuendos. Who could forget Kevin’s sandwich cakes – interestingly called “Kevin’s Love Cakes” and dedicated to his wife? Or Carole talking loudly about “deflowering” her cakes in front of a chortling Noel?

Thrashing both of these though, Pastry Week saw Janusz (master of the baking innuendo) tell us while making his pastries that “I’m going to have 12 bottoms and then I’m going to have 24 tops”. Sounds like quite the night.

Biggest baking fail

Nothing goes entirely to plan in the Bake-Off tent, and this year saw more than a few monstrosities constructed under its canvas roof. In addition to Kevin’s collapsed custard cake, he also found the unholy inspiration to construct a spider of nightmares during Halloween Week.

With its askew legs, staring eyes and unevenly decorated surface, it left Sandro lost for words to describe it (“It looks like…” he stuttered, mute with horror).

This can only be matched by Carole’s steamed puddings for the Pudding Week signature bake, which were left horrendously underbaked and literally collapsed out of their moulds when she lifted them up. Though Paul and Prue manfully tried the plate-splodges that were left, they were unimpressed – “it’s heartbreaking, really”, Prue said, crushingly.

And who could forget Dawn’s mousse cake, two bakes later for the Showstopper? The judges demanded that the cake contain a “surprise” when cut into; Dawn’s carefully constructed layers of mousse collapsed and left the judges with what looked like a deflated Swiss roll. “The surprise is, there’s no surprise,” Dawn said listlessly.

Most impressive showstopper

They said it couldn’t be done. Sandro set out to prove them wrong. In Dessert Week, the bakers were challenged to make a cake out of mousse – an infamously unstable mixture.

While most of the bakers opted to make regular cakes, Sandro went the extra mile and literally created the Earth out of mousse. That’s right: a spherical cake, made from mousse, that didn’t collapse and actually tasted good. It even had a little flag to mark “Sandro island”, and deservedly netted him the Star Baker accolade.

“To be able to put that design together with mousse and keep it together is impressive,” Paul said. “I love the textures and the flavours as well." Still not impressive enough for that coveted handshake though. What is it you want, Paul?

Booziest bake

A switch flipped at some point halfway through the competition, where all a fair few bakers (mainly Sandro and Kevin) realised that the way to Prue’s heart was through the alcoholic content of their bakes.

In Halloween Week, the pair of them went to town and made their apple cakes a whole lot boozier that they had any right to be. Kevin’s apples were poached in cider, while Sandro’s had whisky pipettes inserted into the cake, which indeed went down a treat with Prue.

“That’s really got whisky in it. Even for me, I don’t think I’d put anymore in,” she said. “Well, maybe I will.”

Custard Week also proved surprisingly boozy. While making their îles flottants (basically, poached meringue floating in a crème anglaise), the cork was well and truly popped. Syabira made mojito flavoured islands, Sandro added brandy and prosecco to his custard and Kevin put prosecco in his meringue. Just don’t ask the judges to drive afterwards.

Biggest controversy

Another year, another controversy: this year’s was to do with the producer’s decision to include Mexican Week in the competition. Unfortunately, it went down like a lead balloon with viewers, especially those across the pond in the US (where the show is very popular).

“I love Bake Off, but Mexican Week was a mistake. Tacky jokes about Mexican stereotypes and no attempt to properly pronounce the language,” one viewer wrote. To top it off, there were maracas, fiesta-themed cakes and a lot of sombreros. All of which, critics pointed out, continued to play into misperceptions of the culture.

Most wholesome moment

One of the show’s greatest strengths is its innate wholesomeness. The bakers are never nasty to each other (except, perhaps, for the infamous Baked Alaska incident) and the judges mostly stick to constructive criticism.

Case in point: when Kevin’s custard cake collapsed in Custard Week, Maxy, Janusz and Syabira rallied around to help him mitigate the damage. While some dressed up the collapsed bottom layer with Kevin’s pre-baked macarons, others helped him stabilise the top two tiers.

The result was still a mess – but it was a heart-warming moment that showed no matter how high the stakes - or the cakes - friendship still comes first.

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