Cluttered as it is with magical, mystical MacGuffins, ghosts, curses and ominous knick-knacks, this cheap but seldom cheerful horror feature is the cinematic equivalent of a thrift store of evil. The plot revolves around the Snyder family: insurance salesman dad Daniel (Will Klipstine, also the film’s writer-director), fervent Catholic mum Theresa (Amanda MacDonald), and young daughter and conduit of evil Rosalie (Madeleine McGraw). The poor kid used to be a happy, unexceptional moppet who, judging by the many saccharine sun-filled flashbacks we’re shown, enjoyed playing football and making cupcakes with her parents. But something happened along the way and now she ominously announces at funerals that the deceased is burning in hell at that very moment, and that a servant of the devil called the Harbinger has arrived (does that make her the Harbinger’s harbinger?).
Either way, the Snyders move to what seems like an unremarkable midwestern suburb where the neighbours are super-creepy with their excessive hospitality and talk of neighbourhood watch. On the outskirts of town there’s a Native American seer called Floating Hawk (Irene Bedard) who conveniently dispenses exposition about what’s really going on which, honest-to-God, involves sacred burial grounds, giant keys and evil-dispersing daggers. If a monkey’s paw and a cursed amulet had been thrown in the mix, I wouldn’t have been surprised.
It’s hard to call which is clunkier, Klipstine’s herky-jerky direction or his shouty acting. But at least you can give him some credit for casting McGraw, who can deliver her absurd dialogue with the kind of deadpan straight face that Buster Keaton would admire. Veteran supporting player Steve Monroe (Crazy Ex-Girlfriend) is also a hoot as a jocular neighbour who obviously isn’t the buffoon he seems to be.
• The Curse of Rosalie is on the Icon channel from 13 March and in UK cinemas from 14 April.
