Here’s a deeply depressing statistic: the number of searches for heated blankets has skyrocketed by 611 per cent this year, as a result of the energy crisis and people fearing they won’t be able to heat their own homes during the winter months.
But — and this “but” is doing a lot of heavy lifting here so allow it — there is a reason all the dystopian films are full of really good lewks, okay? (I told you it was a big “but”.) As Churchill famously said: “If you’re going through hell, you might as well look good doing it”. Or, maybe it was “keep going”. Whatever it was, it was very moving.
So instead of letting that blanket statistic chill to your already-quite-cold core, let’s embrace blankie season with open — but, crucially, covered — arms.
Now we’re not going to recommend you a slanket (ew) or anything like that because we’re not evil. Instead, here are some blanket options that are so cute they’ll make you swell with pride every time you whip them out and snuggle underneath their folds. The kind of blankets you’d actually wash (with Vanish and everything) after spilling a bit of your cuppa on it.
The chunky boy
A thick knit blanket that is also weighted seems almost too good to be true — and to some extent, it is, because it’s £294 (thought I’d get that out of the way early, sorry). But still, the Knit Weighted Blanket from Nuzzie does promise to be the last weighted blanket you’ll ever own, which is a pretty heavy promise — no pun intended.
And it’s got great reviews too, which is especially impressive for a weighted blanket, because people get real specific about the weights of their weighted blanket. Not only that, but it’s entirely sustainable and each blanket is made from 500+ plastic bottles, so when you’re tucked up in your blanket you can feel like the trash queen that you really are.
Nuzzie, Knit Weighted Blanket, £294
The “heatwave” one
This should distract you from the biting cold. It’s hot orange and literally named “heatwave”, what more could you want?
Dick Pearce & Friends are typically known for their bellyboard craft and surfer aesthetic, which means this blanket is perfectly suited for sitting on a blustery beach as much as it is for draping over the arm of your sofa. It’s also made in the UK from 100 per cent recycled fibres, so you don’t have to apologise to the ocean if you do end up wearing it to the beach. (And it’s 20 per cent off right now!)
Dick Pearce & Friends, Recycled Cotton GEO Blanket, £80
The DIY one
I know what you’re thinking — knit my own blanket? Easy? Don’t spin me a yarn! Well, a yarn it is, and yarn is what you’re gonna get.
These blankets from Wool and the Gang (points for the name) come with needles, yarn and instructions so you can have the pleasure of making your own thick-knit throw and tell everyone about it every time someone comes round. Yes, it might take a while, but for bragging rights and the feeling of genuine accomplishment, it’s pretty perfect.
Wool and the Gang, Lil’ Take Me Home Blanket, £138
The ‘I don’t want to tell my boyfriend how much I spent on this pig blanket’ one
For a very cute addition to the living room (or bedroom, but maybe ask your partner first), cop this pig blanket from J.J Textiles — available at Wolf&Badger — for round hundred quid. Yes, maybe 100 English pounds is a lot of money to spend on a pig blanket but it’s got like a bajillion sustainability guarantees: it’s 80 per cent wool, 20 per cent cotton and, most importantly, it’s reversible (with piggies on both sides)!
Plus, if you really want to oink it up to the next level, there’s matching pig pillows.
J.J Textile, Piglet blanket, £105
The really fancy one
Loewe’s range of plush striped blankets may be extortionate but they’re also stunning, plus 63 per cent mohair — so you know that baby is gonna be soft.
They come in a range of colourways and are available from Net a Porter and MatchesFashion. Plus, if you need something to assuage the pain of the price tag, at least you’re not purchasing a Gucci quilt blanket — which start at £1,300.
Loewe, Mohair blend blanket, £895 plus another on Net A Porter, £825
The Gucci dupe
If weird patterns, flora and fauna are your type of thing, you could forgo the Gucci and instead nab yourself a significantly cheaper blanket from Valley Cruise Press.
Its mushroom print throw is a favourite, and its popularity clearly caught the eye of Urban Outfitters buyers too, because it’s landed on their website — in case you want to use that cheeky members discount.
Valley Cruise Press, Mushroom magic blanket, £120
The bargain
I know we’re talking uber chic blankets here — and in my defense absolutely every single one of the above is eco-friendly and sustainable, so will naturally come with a higher price tag — but it would be remiss of me not to name one that was under £30. We’re in a cost of living crisis after all, so as much as we may want the Loewe blanket, it may not be within reach.
But an absolute barg comes in the form of this Dunelm tufted throw, which is available in a bunch of different colours (sage, ochre, grey - terracotta not currently available) and made from 100% cotton. You simply love to see it.
Dunelm, Rainbow Tufted Throw, £28
The velvet one
Welcome back to velvet season! You can now officially break out your satin and velour and not feel weird — because there is nothing weirder than velvet in summer (or velvet and sweat — let’s be real here).
Toast knows good blankets, and this collaboration with Glasgow based homeware designer Niki Jones is hand quilted, cotton-filled and comes in a whole host of different colours. One to be swaddled in, for sure.
Toast x Niki Jones, Hand Quilted Velvet Throw, £250
The Instagrammable one
Slowdown Studio is known for its kooky printed throws and funky homeware, and has probably come to your attention because of Instagram — it’s practically illegal to own one of their items and not show it off on the grid.
This throw in particular is ripe for the ‘gramming: it’s called the Moretti Throw and it was designed by maximalist Manchester-based artist Imogen Crossland. It’s as much a piece of art as it is a blanket, and for $250 (£225) you might as well pop it on the grid.
Slowdown Studio, Moretti Throw, £225
The one to impress your mates
“You look cold, [insert name of guest here], do you want a blanket?” you say as you nonchalantly chuck this bad boy across the sofa to your mate. “Oh, it’s Celine? I forgot about that,” you laugh, tossing your hair behind your head, your ego radiating through your skull like a beam of light. “Yeah, it is quite nice isn’t it,” you concede.
This Celine blanket is the ultimate not-so-humble homeware brag, and it works in all seasons — cosy for winter when you need it, or great as a sofa placement when its sunny (branding side up, obviously).
Celine, Blanket in woven cotton, £420
The ‘I got it on sale!’ one
This Soho Home throw is inspired by the furnishings of Soho House Amsterdam, featuring cream boucle yarns and black pom-pom. It’s thick, it’s heavy, and most importantly — it’s on sale.
If you’ve never quite felt as at home as when you’re in Soho House, now you can literally start making your home into one of them.
Soho Home, Osprey Throw, £109
The authentic one
Sometimes you just want to sit under a blanket that makes you feel like you’re sat in front of a crackling fire in a quaint cottage that’s nestled amongst the Scottish highlands. Luckily for you, that blanket exists, and it’s this.
Made by the historic woollen mill in Elgin, Scotland (which also happened to be a favourite of our late queen), the blanket is a collab with Ben Pentreath, an English architectural and interior designer (who also happens to be the designer for much of King Charles III’s pet project, Poundbury).
The blanket is as British as they come, and royally approved, so it’s basically treason if you don’t get it. P.S it comes in turquoise too.
