In the olden days of the missionaries, God used to recruit followers with nothing more than simple prayer and colonisation. Now his emissaries have swapped holy water for industrial inks: a small monastic group in Vienna is offering free tattoos for anyone who wants one. Its venue is right by St Stephen’s Cathedral, in a meeting place called Quo Vadis – or “where are you going?” in Latin.
Well, first you go to the pre-tattoo church service, where the implements are blessed, then you get down to it. It’s ritualistic in that classic Catholic way: bundling intention, theatricality, anticipation, abjection, mortification and catharsis together in the name of the Lord, with a seamy smog of incense and chanting layered over the top. Forget the font, chuck the crucible; it’s in the tattooist’s chair that you’ll get your deliverance.
