Taking the plunge in the Yarra: on your first cold-water swim, it’s OK to swear

Since Melbourne’s lockdown a group of hardy swimmers (the Yarra Yabbies) have been braving the Yarra/Birrarung river. Photograph: Jackson Gallagher/The Guardian

I asked my friend if she wanted to come swimming in the Yarra/Birrarung – near the city – as dawn broke last week.

“It’s safe, they test!” I said. She paused, and for a second I thought she would join me in this foolhardiness. Then she replied: “That’s like saying drinking your own piss is safe.”