Sure things at tonight’s Oscars: Ke Huy Quan, a slap joke, and In Memoriam outrage

Fans at the Academy Awards watch for stars arriving on the champagne-colored carpet Sunday in Los Angeles. (John Locher/AP)

Let’s see, the list of presenters for tonight’s Academy Awards includes Emily Blunt, Harrison Ford, Andrew Garfield, Samuel L. Jackson, Dwayne Johnson, Michael B. Jordan, Jonathan Majors, Elizabeth Olsen, Zoe Saldaña and Sigourney Weaver. Imagine if Jimmy Kimmel took the stage at the outset of the Oscars flanked by that group, and said:

“Good evening and welcome to the 95th annual Academy Awards. Behind me, we have Sgt. Rita Vrataski from ‘Edge of Tomorrow,’ Indiana Jones and Han Solo, Spider-Man, Jules from ‘Pulp Fiction,’ Black Adam, Adonis Creed, Kang the Conquerer, Scarlet Witch, Gamora and Ellen Ripley. There will be no slapping tonight.”