"Once you've said and done the worst thing, you're kind of free."
And folks, whether we like it or not, we're free.
After four seasons spanning five years, Succession is over.
In a series finale of one of the greatest television shows to grace our screens, we witnessed the Roys emotionally (and physically) battle it out in a race to the bottom to claim what's theirs.
And now, after all this time, we have a clear winner.
We need to talk about Tom Wambsgans' supremacy
It's a HUGE night for Wambsgans stans (yes, we exist).
Let's unpack how this clumsy interloper from Saint Paul manipulated his way into being the US CEO of Waystar Royco.
It all comes back to Lukas Matsson. Not only does he think Shiv is "too pushy" and has "too many" ideas, he also wants to get with her, and he thinks the feeling is mutual (it's not), so he'd rather things not get "messy".
He makes Tom sing for his supper, before offering him the world.
"If I can have anyone, why don't I get the guy who put the baby inside her instead of the baby lady?" Matsson asks.
Matsson makes it clear he's not looking for a partner, but a "frontman".
After Greg actually becomes useful for once and pulls up a translation app on his phone while eavesdropping on the Swede, he figures out that Shiv is out and Tom is in.
He snitches to Kendall, who tells Shiv, and very quickly our golden trio have reverted to their childhood selves while reuniting at their mother's beach house in the Caribbean.
After going back and forth, Shiv and Roman finally cave and tell a "happy Ken" he can be top dog, and promptly blend him up "a meal fit for a king".
But happiness? On Succession? It was never going to last.
After half the room votes against the GoJo deal, and the other half sides with the Swede, Shiv the shiv ends up with the tie-breaking vote.
And she knives the king.
We can't not talk about Kendall lying about the waiter
"I don't think you'd be good at it," Shiv says, betraying her brother.
"I feel like if I don't get to do this, it's like, like I might … I might die," Kendall replies, before literally begging his sister for her vote.
Finally, Shiv plays her trump card.
"You can't be CEO because you killed someone," she announces.
And Kendall lies again and again and again.
"That's not an issue. That didn't happen. It's just a thing I said. I made it up. I false memoried it. I'm totally clean. I can do this."
But Roman comes in for final swing, kicking Kendall one more time by saying Shiv "has the bloodline" with her unborn child, saying Logan thought Kendall's kids weren't his.
"They are a pair of randos. One is a buy-in, the other is half Rava, half some filing cabinet guy."
Kendall snaps, attempting to crush Roman's face with his bare hands, before almost attacking Shiv.
"We have this, we can still do this," Kendall attempts, even though everyone just saw him physically fight his siblings in a glass-walled conference room.
"It's all nothing," Roman says. "I'm telling you this because I know it. We're nothing, OK?"
Emotionally bruised and bloody, Kendall keeps fighting, but it's futile.
"Ken, it's done," Frank says. "Seven-six. We sell to GoJo, you don't have it."
Let's chat power rankings
It's over. There are no more moves left to play. Here's where everyone falls for the final time. Of course, Logan will always be one of the most powerful figures in their lives, no matter what happens to Waystar.
Tom
Frank reckons they should have slit Tom's throat in the cradle. But who cares what he thinks! Tom Wambsgans is king. This won't be the last time we talk about this (join our live blog tomorrow!) but can we please discuss this TikTok theory which might have been the key to the ending this whole time? Was Tom really named after baseballer Bill Wambsganss, who completed the only unassisted triple play in history where he took out three players at once? This was either intentional or the wildest coincidence.
Matsson
Try as they might, the Roys couldn't squeeze the Swede dry. He emerges victorious, which is unsurprising. He's not top dog because he was never in direct competition with Kendall, Roman and Shiv. He simply had too much power from the start. But he did lose by revealing just how much of a shameless tech bro he is. Sure, he says the cartoon of Shiv controlling him like a puppet didn't bother him, but it did. And he couldn't handle it. But he's Jesus, and these are just his disciples.
Shiv
Because Succession is a man's world, Shiv's womanhood was ultimately her undoing. Everyone pretend to be shocked! So who can blame her for using her marriage to Tom to her advantage? Who knows where she will end up. Will she remain president of Waystar, a nonsense title Logan plucked out of thin air? If Tom knows what's good for him, he'll dance to the tune of that pregnant cello. Logan always wanted the next CEO to be a killer, and Shiv knifing her brother was a killer move.
Greg
Greg lives to "greg" for Tom another day, and thank goodness for that because there might have been riots in the streets if Greg became CEO. After years of sucking up to his boss, he finally became Judas when he sold Tom out to Kendall in order to guarantee himself a good deal. But it wasn't enough. Just like Logan, Tom kicks Greg just to see if he'll come back to him, and of course he does. To really drive home the fact that Tom owns Greg, he slaps a purple auction sticker on his forehead. Now that's cinema.
Connor
Connor is the true "winner" of Succession because he wasn't playing the game! He's too busy selling Logan's possessions and remodelling the apartment. Shiv and Kendall might never speak again, and who knows what state of mind Roman is in, but they will always have Connor, and Connor will always have Willa, and Willa will always have her plays.
Mencken
There was no sight of Jeryd Mencken in the finale, which is a shame because we deserve to see Justin Kirk's eyebrows one last time. But his path to the White House just got more complicated thanks to all that "court stuff" playing out about ATN's premature call for the state of Wisconsin. But, according to Matsson, Mencken loves Tom, so he's going to be just fine.
Gerri
We can all sleep easy tonight knowing Gerri Kellman is going to be OK. She's getting her millions, rightfully so, and Tom is smart enough to realise he needs her. "I want to talk to Gerri. Gerri gets it. She's not afraid of the dark." Plus, just the sheer sight of her was enough to make Roman spiral. Logan would be rolling in his grave. Stay winning, Gerri!
Frank and Karl (tie)
Well, Frank's a winner because he backed the winning team. He voted against Logan's children because he knows what's best for the company, and he can see they're not serious people. They're carrying on in a glass boardroom! The pair might think they have a choice in what happens next ("golden parachute or one last rodeo?") but they don't realise they've made their way onto Tom's kill list. But if they go, they go together.
Hugo
Hugo is walking on ice as thin as his neck. Karolina is out to get him, so he needs to take those scraps from Kendall's table and run. He can suck up to Tom as much as he wants, but women talk and Tom knows he's not to be trusted.
Roman
The shell of a man! I will never emotionally recover after watching Romulus rub his face so hard on Kendall's chest that he splits his stitches open. If Kendall was begging Shiv to crown him, Roman was begging Kendall to drop it because he couldn't go on anymore. But Kendall was right. Roman didn't want to be CEO because he couldn't continue to live his life trying to reach the expectations placed on him by his father. Our boy is finally free.
Kendall
Any doubt that Kendall Roy was the protagonist of Succession was quashed when the series ended with a shot of him in contemplation, his father's former bodyguard watching over him. Over the entire series, Jeremy Strong has cemented his performance among the greats, now uttered in the same breath as James Gandolfini's Tony Soprano and Bryan Cranston's Walter White. Succession was never going to be about Kendall winning, because that would be too neat of an ending. But what a pleasure it was to watch him try.
Notes and observations
- Jeremy Strong revealed to the official Succession podcast that the final scene was meant to end with Kendall and Roman, but Jeremy kept going and walked into the boardroom and the director followed suit.
- Watch Alexander Skarsgard make his pitch for a Succession spin-off.
- Not a note, but please enjoy this clip of the cast singing together.
Before you go, don't forget our post-finale live blog happening tomorrow
We want to hear from you! What did you make of the finale? What would Logan think? Which lines are your all-time favourites?
We will be unpacking it all in our post-finale Succession live blog happening on Tuesday, May 30, from 11am right here on ABC News. See you then!
