Every now and then I generously offer my opinion on why everyone’s favourite TV show or movie is actually pretty stupid and it doesn’t tend to go down very well. My thoughts on Game of Thrones caused an absolute bloodbath in my online mentions. This time I’m prepared for the backlash: I’ve locked my Twitter account and started planning my “I’ve been cruelly silenced by the masses” speaking tour. Do your worst, everyone, I’m ready to be cancelled!
Here we go then: I’m sorry to say this, but Succession, the award-winning HBO show, is overrated. Season one, I’ll gladly admit, was incredible. Season two was just as good. But after that, it started getting meh. It is the same old story over and over again: rich people backstabbing rich people and swearing a lot as they wallow in opulent misery. I’m a big fan of swearing, but it gets a bit much when every other word is an expletive. There were apparently 2,071 “fucks” in the first three series of Succession and no episode had fewer than 40 uses. The finale of season three had 119. My problem isn’t the crassness, it’s just that it all feels a little contrived. It’s as if the writers have mistaken profanity for profundity.
The shaky cinematography also feels a little try-hard. I know it’s “cinematic” and supposed to make you feel like a fly on the wall, but it makes me seasick. That is my truth and my lived experience and I would like you to respect it.
Before everyone comes at me I’d like to clarify that I’m not saying Succession is a bad show. The acting is phenomenal, and the characters are constantly lobbing perfect one-liners. Indeed, sometimes the show feels more like a succession of soundbites than anything else. “Nobody talks like this,” I sometimes whisper at the screen as I half-watch over my wife’s shoulders (she’s a big fan and tut-tutted when I told her I was writing this). “Nobody fucking talks like this!”
So I’m not trying to argue that Succession is bad – I’m just trying to say it’s no longer as good as it was. And I don’t get all the hype. I mean, come on, the hype is out of control. The other week, for example, (spoiler alert!) the LA Times published a fake obituary for Logan Roy that went viral. The Daily Mail, meanwhile, put Roy’s death on its front page. It was as if something genuinely momentous had happened instead of some fictional guy on a TV programme getting killed off in an aeroplane bathroom.
Another issue I have with Succession is that even though it has a vast budget (HBO apparently won’t even go on record about how much it costs because it’s so wild, but it is estimated to be about $90m for a series) and is full of fancy people doing fancy things, I don’t find it particularly escapist. Perhaps that’s because it’s too tasteful. All the clothes, for example, epitomise “quiet luxury”. What’s the point of quiet luxury, eh? I want to gawp at the ostentation. I want to see Gossip Girl-levels of fashion (I’m talking the original series here, not the godawful reboot). If we’re talking great TV, by the way, then I don’t think many things can top Gossip Girl. It was never considered prestige TV, probably because it centred on teenage girls, but it was incredibly entertaining. Perhaps the sad truth is that I just like trash. Give me Love is Blind or Gossip Girl over pretentious prestige TV any day.
Anyway, I’ll give Succession its due: at least it knows when to stop. This season (the fourth) is going to be its last. With the exception of reality TV, I think every show should end with season three or four. Far too many popular shows (Orange is the New Black and the Handmaid’s Tale are prime examples) drag on until they implode. Knowing when to end things is vastly underrated.
• Arwa Mahdawi is a Guardian columnist
