When career-minded people think of learning, reading a book or biography of a successful person comes to mind. Or taking a college class. Or attending an industry conference. But an often-underappreciated way to acquire new skills and boost your competency is to learn from mistakes.
"A lot of things we can learn from a textbook, but some things you can't," said psychotherapist Amy Morin, editor-in-chief of mental health website Verywell Mind, and author of "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do." "We learn from doing. Making mistakes can be some of life's greatest teaching tools. We look at mistakes as an opportunity to learn rather than as a permanent roadblock."
Everyone makes mistakes. Nobody is perfect. You might have zapped out an ill-advised email that caused a problem. Or undermined a project due to sloppiness. Or turned off a prospective client due to a lack of preparation.
But if you want to get ahead on the job, owning your mistakes is a prerequisite for success. What you don't want to do is hide your mistake from others or fail to admit to yourself that you screwed up.
"You need to be reflective," said Andy Simon, partner at Simon Associates Management Consultants, a firm that specializes in helping companies and their people change. "When you are learning from your mistakes it gives you an opportunity to reflect on your mistakes and move forward," said Simon.
So, what's the secret to learning from your mistakes, and turning a screw-up into a teaching moment?
Own The Mistake
You can't learn from a misstep unless you acknowledge that you made a mistake. And take responsibility for it.
What you don't want to do is point fingers at others. Play the blame game. Or pretend it didn't happen. Why? There's a good chance your colleagues will think less of you or question your competency and trustworthiness.
"The blame game just creates a cancer for an organization," said Simon.
Too often, we put all our energy into hiding our mistakes, said Morin. People fear the ramifications of their miscue, don't want their boss to be upset with them, and don't want to let down co-workers or feel dumb.
"When people figure out you are covering it up, it may cause you to look like you're sloppy, careless or you don't care about your job," said Morin. "And that can cause people to lose faith in you."
A better course of action to learn from mistakes, Morin said, "is to come clean and ask yourself, 'How do I do better next time?' "
Identify Cause Of Miscue To Learn From Mistakes
Do a post-mortem to figure out what caused you to mess up. Were you rushing? Did you lack the proper skill set to execute the task? Was there a communications mix-up? Did you overpromise?
"I have a lot of welt marks on my back from learning from my mistakes," said Simon, 79. "Understanding the root cause that led to the mistake is terribly important." Especially if your goal is to not make the same mistake again.
Simon learned early in his career, for example, that being the "tough guy" boss doesn't work with everyone. He also learned that giving poor-performing employees "too much of the benefit of the doubt and hoping they would change" often hurts the business. Several times in his career he kept people in their positions for too long even though he knew deep down that they were not right for the job. Eventually, he said, he had to let them go.
Knowing what went wrong allows you to correct your mistake, Simon said. It also exposes what your weaknesses are and areas you need to improve. And it also helps ensure that you're better prepared for future work challenges.
Fix The Problem
Mistakes are only a learning tool if you take steps to fix the problem that caused them, adds Morin. One common mistake people make after making a mistake is viewing themselves as a bad person or incompetent. "When a person says 'I'm not good enough,' they are much more likely to then think 'I'm not capable of doing any better,' " said Morin.
A better approach is to reinforce that you're a good person, just one that made a mistake. Know you possess the proper learning mindset to do things better the next time.
And just saying you're sorry won't cut it. Morin says there are two key ingredients for an apology to be effective: Admit that you made a mistake and let your boss or team know how you're going to fix it.
"People will trust you more and will worry less that you will repeat the mistake," said Morin.
