Stephen Fry and Sandi Toksvig are leading calls for the formal recognition of humanist marriages in England and Wales, amid claims their unofficial status discriminates against LGBTQ+ people.
The TV presenters – both humanists – want the justice secretary, Dominic Raab, to follow Scotland, Northern Ireland, Jersey and Guernsey in granting humanist marriages the same legal standing as civil and religious ceremonies. The government has been considering making changes for a decade, but has yet to act.
In a letter to Raab also signed by the chair of the Conservative party’s affiliated LGBTQ+ group, Elena Rose Bunbury, and her Labour and Liberal Democrat equivalents, Fry and Toksvig argue that “legal recognition would have a profound impact”.
Sixty-three per cent of lesbian, gay or bisexual people have “no religion”, according to the 2021 census – almost twice the rate among straight people. Humanist celebrants also have a long tradition of conducting unofficial same-sex weddings, going back decades before the law was changed to allow them in 2013.
“Few religious groups offer same-sex marriages,” they said. “The lack of recognition of humanist marriages only reduces same-sex couples’ options further … The matter has been under review in England and Wales for a decade now. That’s more than long enough.”
Methodists, Quakers and Unitarians are among the religious groups that offer same-sex marriages, but the Church of England does not. In February, its General Synod voted to start blessing civil marriages of same-sex couples.
In England and Wales, humanist marriages remain unrecognised, in part because the law governing register office weddings prohibits any religious content and religion has been taken to include humanism under the Human Rights Act. Religious marriages are also possible only in registered places of worship and humanists, who believe there is no afterlife or supernatural side to the universe, do not worship.
Fry has previously described his humanism as “an acceptance of the awesome and splendid responsibility we each have for our own destinies, ethics and morals”.
A common humanist tenet is that life is short, nothing follows it and so people need to make the most of their time. Official weddings in England and Wales cannot include a reading to that effect. Anyone wanting a humanist wedding must also book a second civil ceremony to be legally married, adding hundreds of pounds to the cost.
Humanist weddings are entirely bespoke to reflect the lives of the people getting married, frequently involve symbolic rituals such as “hand-fasting” (tying together couples’ hands with ribbons) and can take place in any location, all of which takes them outside current marriage laws.
The call for change is also being backed by Nancy Kelley, the chief executive of Stonewall, the gay rights campaigner Peter Tatchell and the Terrence Higgins Trust.
About 1,100 unofficial humanist weddings are conducted in England and Wales annually; more than Jewish weddings and about the same number as Baptist weddings, according to official figures. Humanist weddings were made legal in Scotland in 2005, in Northern Ireland and Jersey in 2018 and in Guernsey in 2021.
Last year, a government-commissioned review of laws on weddings concluded the rules are “confusing, out-of-date and restrictive”, particularly those preventing the use of different venues such as beaches and cruise ships. The Law Commission also called for “a path to legalising non-religious belief ceremonies, such as humanist weddings, in England and Wales”.
In 2020, the high court ruled that the failure to recognise humanist weddings was discriminatory and the justice secretary “cannot … simply sit on his hands” and do nothing. The government has said it wants to introduce a wholesale reform of marriage law, but humanists argue it can make humanist weddings legal before that.
“Legal recognition of humanist marriages would be good for couples, good for marriage, and good for the economy,” said Andrew Copson, the chief executive of Humanists UK. “It would strengthen freedom of religion or belief and level England and Wales up to match Scotland and Northern Ireland. It is what the public wants. It is past time it happens.”
The Ministry of Justice said that allowing humanist weddings would require the creation of a new category of marriage, known as “belief marriage”. It said rushing through changes to make humanist marriage legally binding would not address other issues in marriage law which affect other groups such as Hindus and Muslims whose religious ceremonies are not recognised in law.
“We asked the Law Commission to conduct a wholesale review of marriage law and are carefully considering their report,” a spokesperson said. “This is a complex area of the law and the 57 changes that they recommended for extensive reform, including any changes that would make humanist weddings legally binding, need to be fully considered and would require an act of parliament to implement.”
