T.O.? Now you can call him TKO.
Terrell Owens knocked a man to the ground with two punches outside a CVS pharmacy in L.A., according to TMZ.com, after the man allegedly threatened a man having a conversation with the Hall of Fame receiver.
“Oh, he dropped him!” said a witness who recorded the fight, which was soon defused.
There were no arrests — or even reviews for targeting.
Headlines
— At Fark.com: Facing the nightmare scenario of both Alabama and Ohio State missing the playoffs, the CFP expands to 12 teams.”
— At TheOnion.com: “British World Cup attendees accused of smuggling alcohol into stadium through bloodstreams.”
Avoiding a stink
A skunk showed up in the stands at last Sunday’s Browns-Bucs game in Cleveland, walking up and down the steps of section 140 before disappearing beneath the seats. Like the Browns’ O-line opening holes for Nick Chubb, fans gave the critter lots of leeway.
Fortunately, Pepe Le Pew didn’t get called for illegal use of glands.
Hostage situation
Canada won its first Davis Cup title in the event’s 109-year history, beating Australia 2-0 in Malaga, Spain.
The euphoria quickly died, however, when the U.S. refused to trade the Stanley Cup for it.
d) All of the above
Sports quiz, from Bruce Penton of the Medicine Hat (Alberta) News:
“Sports television viewers could use less of:
a) Replays and slow-mo shots of gruesome injuries
b) Shots of rambunctious fans brandishing silly signs
c) Gambling commercials”
Swinging for singles
Seattle has been declared the No. 1 city for singles, according to a study released by the personal-finance website WalletHub.com.
Heck, Ichiro could have told you that two decades ago.
In need of a closer
The Jaguars scored with 14 seconds left to beat the Ravens last Sunday — meaning 7-4 Baltimore has blown leads of 21, 17, 10 and 7 points in its four losses.
So, does Edwin Diaz want to play football too?
Talking the talk
— Vic Tafur of The Athletic, on Raiders coach Josh McDaniels losing to the Colts in the debut of first-time coach Jeff Saturday: “That’s like Garry Kasparov walking into Central Park and getting checkmated by a guy with mustard stains on his sweatshirt.”
— Jack Finarelli of SportsCurmudgeon.com, on Colorado — 1-11 this past season and outscored by an average of 47-15 in the losses — again looking for a new football coach: “Colorado is more than a reclamation project; Colorado needs a resurrection.”
One giant step for Perry
“RIP, Gaylord Perry,” tweeted Janice Hough of LeftCoastSportsBabe.com. “My favorite story about Perry has nothing to do with the spitter. Former SF Giants manager Alvin Dark once said, ‘There’ll be a man on the moon before Gaylord Perry hits a home run.’
“On July 20, 1969, a few hours after Neil Armstrong set foot on the moon, Perry hit his first home run.” (He finished his career with six.)
Quote marks
— Nick Canepa of The San Diego Union-Tribune, on Las Vegas being awarded the 2028 Final Four: “It wasn’t long ago the NCAA would have gone to Ukraine, played outdoors and put images of Putin on players’ singlets before placing their big deal in Southern Nevada.”
— Comedy writer Brad Dickson, via Twitter, on the Cornhuskers’ new football hire: “Fun fact: The last two Nebraska head coaches to beat Iowa — Mickey Joseph & Bo Pelini — got fired the next day. My only advice to Matt Rhule: lose to Iowa.”
— Ryan Brown of NextRoundLive.com, after Mizzou WR Luther Burden tweeted some personal news: “Nothing more 2022 college football than announcing you aren’t entering the transfer portal while simultaneously announcing an NIL deal.”
— Tim Hunter of KRKO Radio, on Chiefs QB Patrick Mahomes and his wife welcoming their second child: “Doesn’t the godfather have to be Jake from State Farm?”
Invoking the 12th Man
Seahawks linebacker Darrell Taylor got so excited when Quandre Diggs made a game-opening interception against the Raiders that he came off the bench and got into the action — undetected by the officials.
“You have to respect (his) excitement for his teammates and his willingness to get downfield and make some blocks,” wrote Yahoo! Sports’ Frank Schwab. “His knowledge of the basic rules of football might still need work.”
Extra credits
We’ve come to the part of the movie where the credits start rolling.
Sideline Chatter inspiration: Tom FitzGerald, San Francisco Chronicle
Creator: Justice Hill
Designer: Rich Boudet
Editing: Nathan Joyce and Carlyn Foster
Understudy: Scott Hanson
Quote, end quote
— Mike Bianchi of the Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel: “With former ESPN analyst Jeff Saturday being hired as the interim head coach of the Indianapolis Colts and former ESPN analyst Trent Dilfer being hired as the new head coach at UAB, isn’t it only a matter of time before Schefty replaces Nathaniel Hackett in Denver?”
— At TheBeaverton.com: “Sidney Crosby: ‘I would never let my children play hockey. The risk of getting drafted by Edmonton is too high.’ ”
— NBC’s Cris Collinsworth, on the Eagles’ Jalen Hurts getting some help from behind on a quarterback sneak: “The Double Cheek Push.”
— Mavs coach Jason Kidd, to reporters, after Luka Doncic’s third 40-point triple-double of the young season: “It’s getting boring. I mean, let’s see something different. Maybe do it with his left hand. … I’m just joking.”
That’s all, folks
With the world safely back on its axis — the Mariners finally back in the playoffs and the Washington Huskies reclaiming the Apple Cup — I guess I can safely retire now.
Thanks for going along on this 23-year Sideline Chatter ride in The Seattle Times. Adios.
