A Scots mum has warned parents to be aware of the hidden dangers that people with eating disorders face around Christmas time.
Emma Broadhurst, 51, has opened up about her family's struggle to manage her eldest daughter's eating disorder during the festive season, which left them feeling like they were living with an 'intruder' who became a sixth member of the family.
The mum of three says her daughter developed the mental health condition at the age of 17, with Emma initially growing concerned about her daughters 'extreme exercising' and explosive moods which created an underlying tension in the family.
Emma says that though she was unaware that she had eating disorder, she noticed that the behaviours appeared to intensify over Christmas with her daughter struggling to sit still and hardly eating. Now aged 22, Emma says her daughter has been in recovery for four years but explained that it was hard for the family during the festive period when there is such a focus on food.
Speaking to the Daily Record about the experience she said: "It was like having another member of family that you weren't aware of and then suddenly became an intruder and you couldn't get rid of. It was like having the world's worst-behaved person in your house 24/7 and you didn't know how to get rid of them.
"You couldn't talk to them. You couldn't rationalise with them, you can only engage with them. They just took over everything."
Emma says that being around the disorder was really challenging for family and friends with conversations often devolving into toddler style meltdowns as her daughter struggled to cope.
She continued: "We had two really bad Christmases - the first one we didn't know she had an eating disorder but we realised there was something going on because she wasn't herself. She was over-exercising to the extreme.
"Her behaviour was just ghastly, she wouldn't sit still Christmas meal and she didn't really want to eat.
"There was just that underlying tension there all the time."
The mum says that though her daughter appeared better after being admitted to mental health services, she says that it didn't make Christmas easier. Emma explained that the food-focused nature of the holiday mixed with changes in routine was tough for her daughter.
"You don't suddenly eat three meals a day. You might have a meal plan and you hang on to that meal plan.
"You rely on that meal plan and then suddenly over Christmas that goes out the window because you're eating at strange times, you're eating all these different things and there's a huge focus on foods.
"There's a huge focus on, if you're going out what you're wearing, how you look and all of that, so it just intensifies everything."
Emma says she struggled to understand why her daughters eating disorder voice returned after Christmas after having months with no hassle or flare-ups. The mum says it wasn't until she went on a course run by eating disorder charity Beat that it finally clicked.
She believes that the free 'coping with Celebrations ' sessions helped give her and the family the tools they needed to help their daughter to manage her eating disorder. One of the things she says helped was the ability to have a conversation about her daughter's feeling in early December.
She says this helps her plan so if her daughter is struggling Emma might do meals differently - such as having more regular meal times or having buffet style instead of pilling everything on the plate. She added that lots of little changes and discussions around food helped alleviate her daughter's anxiety and minimise triggers.
"One of the things throughout recovery you have to do is learn how to distract during mealtimes and I think that at Christmas you have to intensify that a bit more because there is so much focus on food", Emma explained.
"There was lots of little snippets that helped me cope with Christmas and planning that a bit more. It taught me how to have those conversations and the safest ways to have those conversations.
"It gave me the confidence to have those conversations with my daughter and I think as a parent is having the confidence to do that is a huge thing."
Kirsty Pavey, Beat’s National Lead for Scotland, says: "At Beat we’ve been experiencing a year-on-year increase in demand for eating disorder support during the festive season, and we wouldn’t be surprised if 2022 becomes our most contacted year yet.
"We designed our Coping with Celebrations programme as a safe, supportive space for carers to share their experiences, hear from others in similar situations, and receive guidance."
Celebrations workshops are running until 16th December 2022 and are available to book via the Beat website.
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