Robbie Williams has slammed fans for requesting “weird” selfies with him in the bathroom while out and about.
The British hitmaker took to Instagram on Wednesday with a long, expletive-filled rant about the “bizarre“ situations he can find himself in due to fame.
Sharing a lengthy caption, he began: “When I’m out at a restaurant or a bar, going to the toilet is weird. Because that’s the only time I’m by myself.
“Some people sense this as the big opportunity. The amount of times I’ve turned around from the urinal to find someone that needed to visit the toilet to wash their hands. Their hands!
“No p**s, just a quick hand wash. ‘Cos that happens in real life and isn’t suspicious. I will then wash my hands next to the person ‘washing’ theirs and have to partake in a striking-up of a ‘natural’ conversation.
He lamented: “Small talk whilst tucking your smalls in.”
“They establish they know who I am by asking a Robbie-based question. Usually, ‘What are you doing here then Robbie?’ Well mate, I just had a p**s and now I’m washing my hands. What are you doing?”
Williams then revealed that the most “awkward thing” happens – fans reach out for a handshake with wet hands and ask for a selfie, something he brands a “bleak request”.
“Then the most awkward thing about this whole charade happens,” he continued. “The man will put his wet hand out to shake my wet hand. I always offer my elbow. As to sort of ‘cheers’ to their elbow. Then they ask for a photo. Which is always a bleak request.
“I don’t want to do a photo with you in the bogs. Someone filmed me when I was at the urinal once. That was interesting.”
He concluded: “Most people are taking these written accounts for what they are. My observations on my bizarre life. Some people read them and think I’m being ungrateful. I’m not.
“I’d sign up for this life a trillion times over. But sometimes I’m just a man with his c**k in his hand wondering what is about to greet him when he turns around from the urinal.”
His social media post comes after the release of his self-titled docuseries on Netflix.
Over three episodes, the show addresses Williams’ Take That days, his public spat with Oasis at Knebworth, his mental health and how he’s doing now.
He also reflected on his “confusing” but “magical” romantic relationship with ex Geri Horner.
Williams shared: “It was a very confusing relationship because she’s a girl, I’m a boy, and we are very good friends trying to sort out the wreckage of the past.
However, the Rock DJ hitmaker admitted their romance was doomed from the beginning as he had just started treatment for his addiction issues.
He began: “Our relationship starts when I’m in AA – you’re told not to get into a relationship in the first year, and I get it – I can’t even look after a cactus let alone somebody else.
“I found her company very, very easy, there is a silliness.
“We got on really well, it was fun, we were a little gang sharing a magical moment in a magical place... we were every fond of each other, I’ve got them, they’ve got me.”
