I may be many things, but I’m not a rapper. I discover this when I’m asked to freestyle a few verses on a visit to London’s Abbey Road recording studios. Immediately lines from famous rappers flood into my head – some classic Biggie, a few Young Thug yelps, the theme to The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air – but I’ve got to think up something original.
Out of desperation, I decide to rap about my morning routine. Adopting a slow pace and simple rhyme scheme that even the Sugarhill Gang would disdain, I begin: “I wake up at seven and I brush my teeth.” Already I am at a loss. What rhymes with “teeth”? Panicking, I look at the computer in front of me, which is running a demo of iRap, AI software built to assist lyric writing in real time. It has been transcribing my words and offers possible rhymes I might want to use: “heath, sheath, underneath”. Could that work? “Make a bacon sandwich, put some cheese underneath,” I sigh. I have fallen short of even my own low standards.
