Sometimes grief does not feel like a straight line. A person may seem fine for weeks and then hear a familiar song, smell a particular perfume, visit an old place or discover an old photograph and suddenly feel the loss as intensely as before. They may even wonder why the pain keeps returning when they desperately want to move forward. Psychology suggests that recurring grief is not necessarily a sign that someone is refusing to let go. Attachment, memory, emotional conditioning, rumination and the continuing-bonds process can all influence how loss is experienced. For some people, reminders can reactivate an emotional response that had become quieter, while for others, repeatedly thinking about the person may represent an attempt to maintain a meaningful psychological connection.
