Someone can compliment you, laugh at your jokes, ask how your day is going and behave as though you are a close friend, only for you to discover that they have been criticizing you, spreading gossip or undermining you when you are not around. This kind of behavior can feel particularly confusing because the person appears warm and supportive during direct interactions. Psychology suggests that this apparent contradiction can involve impression management, social self-monitoring, manipulation, interpersonal distrust and personality traits such as Machiavellianism. However, not everyone who behaves differently in different social situations is deliberately deceptive. People can also avoid confrontation, behave inconsistently or say things privately that they would never say directly. The key psychological issue is whether the behavior represents a repeated pattern of strategic deception and exploitation.
