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Daily Mirror
Daily Mirror
Lifestyle
Julia Banim

Psychologist explains how you can bond with your baby - before they're even born

Although your baby may not exactly be capable of having a full-on natter just yet, developing verbal communication from an early stage is so very important.

With this in mind, psychologist and psychotherapist Emma Kenny, who has worked with children and young people for some 15 years, has stressed the importance of communicating with your little one, and getting verbally acquainted even before they're born.

According to Kenny, effective communication has a powerful effect on your child's language development, whether through playing music, singing, or reading beloved bedtime stories, all while helping to strengthen your bond.

Kenny, who recently teamed up with Aptamil Advanced for their new mindful feeding campaign #ShareTheMomentsThatMatter, believes feeding time presents a particularly good opportunity to build up communication.

Effective communication can help strengthen the bond between you and your baby (Stock Photo) (Getty Images/iStockphoto)

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Speaking with The Mirror, Kenny said: "It doesn't matter what story you read your baby when you're feeding them. It doesn't matter whether you're using poetry. It doesn't matter whether you're reciting your favourite books.

"It doesn't matter if you're creating a story just so you can tell that baby something intriguing and exciting about your day and form it into a story.

"What's happening there is the child picking up on the verbal cues. They're non-verbal at the time but they're picking up on verbal cues. That's helping the brain to develop."

Emma Kenny says feeding time is a particularly good time for your baby to learn verbal cues (Emma Kenny)

Sing lullabies to your baby before they're born

According to Kenny, babies are able to recognise lullabies while still in utero, so you can begin to communicate even before holding them in your arms for the first time.

Kenny revealed she herself sang to her own children right the way through her pregnancies, and recommends classical music in particular.

She added: "Before baby's born, a lot of classes will play music. Classical music is apparently something that works very well and definitely rhythmic music.

"So get your partner to read to your belly. All of those things undoubtedly are useful, and I don't just think that's because there'll be a memory reflex of that for the baby. I think part of that is where the bonding begins as well."

Mimic your baby's mouth shapes during feeding time

While holding your baby close, Kenny recommends mimicking different mouth shapes, something she says they greatly enjoy.

She explained: "The great thing about being able to hold your baby close when you're feeding is that even if they stop for a moment because babies will do that, they will pause and will kind of look at you.

"Sometimes they'll do different mouth shapes. If you mimic the mouth shape, they will actually find deeply pleasurable and they'll often mimic back. The same with a 'coo' and an 'ahh'. These are all developmental milestones, essentially, that are being created through those interactions."

Babies love it when parents mimic different mouth shapes (Stock Photo) (Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Look out for your baby's eye movements

Once your baby reaches a stage where "eye movement is everything", Kenny advises observing what they are looking at, using this as an opportunity to develop their language store.

She explained: "When they're looking at something, you can say 'pretty light' or you can say 'cat' or you can say 'dog', or you can say 'hungry' because they're looking at food.

"Just by bringing these conversations in, first, you're developmentally enabling them to understand their communication, so that as they start to communicate, they already have a language store."

Encourage your baby to babble and giggle away

Kenny continues to say that encouraging babbling and various funny baby noises can help with your little one's language development, as well as the development of their mouth muscles.

She says: "Encouraging those kinds of moments, where they can babble and laugh and giggle and chat and blow raspberries. It's teaching a whole host of things, from the secureness of the relationship to the thriving of communication, which is obviously really powerful."

Think about your expressions when speaking with your baby

According to Kenny, it's really important to consider your facial expressions when chatting with your baby, making sure they know they are being listened to and fully acknowledged.

Kenny said: "Exaggerate your expressions. Lots of reinforcing, rewarding noises, lots of smiles. If a child looks like they're struggling, make sure that you respond and say, 'oh, you look like that's hurting.'

"Exaggerate so the baby feels heard, feels acknowledged, feels attended to."

Kenny advises reminding your baby you are fully present with them, and urges parents to be "delighted around them" as much as possible, which she says can also be very beneficial for communication.

She added: "When they give you a smile, really reinforce what a beautiful smile they're giving you. When they're feeding and they're, looking into your eyes, tell them how beautiful they are. Make clear that you are seeing them fully."

Do you have any parenting tips to share? Email us at julia.banim@reachplc.com

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