No round of the Premier League is complete without drama. And thankfully (or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it), this weekend was filled with questions, controversies and an avalanche of goals.
The ‘congrats on participating’ award
Have you or your child ever come home with a participation trophy after utterly failing in a sporting event? Will Marcus Rashford be showing off his new hardware? This weekend, Rashford was largely a passenger for Manchester United in their 1-0 defeat to Newcastle. During his 61 minutes on the pitch, Rashford produced zero shots, created zero chances and didn’t have a single touch in the Newcastle penalty area.
The icing on the cake came eight minutes into the second half; after Tino Livramento cruised past him, Rashford started walking rather than trying to make amends for his mistake. Any idea that Erik ten Hag would install the high-pressing, fluid football he coached at Ajax has long been submarined by the lack of urgency in his forward line and a disjointed midfield structure. But the performance away at Newcastle represented a new low point for the Manchester United manager.
Blame is being spread around. It was André Onana last week, Scott McTominay the week before. This week it’s Rashford’s turn under the United bus. His body language and sloth-like work-rate remain issues. But, hey, at least he showed up.
Player of the week
Trent Alexander-Arnold has had a great couple of weeks. He won a Three Lions version of The Great British Bake Off (earning a Hollywood Handshake in the process), scored the equaliser last week against Manchester City and then dazzled on Sunday. His late strike earned Liverpool a 4-3 over Fulham in a thriller at Anfield. Alexander-Arnold initially thought he gave Liverpool the opener after his free kick came off the bar and passed the goalline. However, it was credited as an own goal as it hit the Fulham’s keeper back on the way in. Alexander-Arnold eventually found the net after 88 minutes, a clutch strike that sealed the win.
His impact in front of goal was obvious, but Alexander-Arnold was everything, everywhere, all at once for Liverpool on Sunday. Only Virgil van Dijk finished the game with more touches than Liverpool’s hybrid defender/midfielder. After starting at inverted right-back, Jürgen Klopp pushed Alexander-Arnold into midfield after Fulham took a 3-2 lead. Joe Gomez was slotted in at right back with Alexander-Arnold given a free role further up the pitch; he rewarded the manager with the match-winner from the edge of the box.
Liverpool’s reworked midfield has brought more craft and balance to the team. But Alexander-Arnold remains Klopp’s creative fulcrum. They now sit second in the league, two points behind Arsenal. If nerdy metrics are your thing, Klopp’s side also sit above Arsenal in the expected points table. We have a genuine, three-way title race.
The ‘ka-chow’ award
Jay Rodriguez recorded the fastest goal of the Premier League this season when he scored after 15 seconds. Charlie Taylor’s sublime cross found the Burnley striker, who headed the ball into the bottom right corner. The goal not only opened the floodgates for Burnley in their 5-0 win over Sheffield United, but helped the 34-year-old make Premier League history by becoming the first player to score in the opening 15 seconds of two separate matches. His previous accolade came in 2013 when he scored for Southampton after 13.68 seconds at Stamford Bridge. As Lightning McQueen would say: ka-chow!
Stat of the week
Arsenal joined the coveted 100 club with their opening goal in a 2-1 win against Wolves on Saturday. The Gunners had a flying start at the Emirates when Bukayo Saka scored six minutes in. His neat finish was Arsenal’s 100th goal of 2023 – they are the fifth team to reach that milestone in Europe’s top-five leagues. Manchester City (137), Real Madrid (119), Bayern Münich (111) and Bayer Leverkusen (110) are also on the list. Saka’s goal was his 36th for the club in the Premier League, pushing him past former Arsenal great Cesc Fàbregas.
The ‘I’m not mad, I’m disappointed’ award
You know that feeling. You’ve seen that look. They’re not mad, they’re just disappointed. You could catch it in Pep Guardiola’s eye on Sunday. Despite scoring City’s crucial third goal v Tottenham, Jack Grealish was shown a yellow for unnecessarily kicking the ball away after a foul, ruling him out of a midweek game against Aston Villa. Grealish’s suspension poses a problem for Guardiola against Unai Emery’s high-flying Villa: Jérémy Doku picked up an injury in the draw and is a doubt for Wednesday, meaning Guardiola will have to rejig his front line without his top-two options on the left side.
But Grealish was not alone. Erling Haaland was less disappointed and just plain mad at referee Simon Hooper. Hooper was one of the authors of this season’s biggest officiating mess in the game between Tottenham and Liverpool. That was a sequel to the opening week fiasco between Wolves and Manchester United. His trilogy on Sunday was the latest entry in that what’s-going-on-with-officials franchise: late in the game, Hooper initially played an advantage for a foul on Haaland, before calling play back to award a free-kick despite Grealish running through on goal unopposed. Haaland was incensed. Unlike most franchise fair, Hooper at least gets points for originality.
Goal of the week
Despite serious competition from Dwight McNeil and teammate Alexander-Arnold, Alexis Mac Allister takes the gong. He scored a rocket for Liverpool in their dramatic 4-3 win over Fulham. It wasn’t as glitzy as Alejandro Garnacho’s wonder goal from the week before, but the finesse, control and power of his strike claims the prize this week.
🇦🇷💥 Mac Allister hit that with some venom! pic.twitter.com/qpYTgepmuJ
— EuroFoot (@eurofootcom) December 4, 2023
The ‘hero to zero’ award
It’s not often we see a player score on both ends of the pitch, let alone within three minutes. Son Heung-min opened the scoring for Spurs with the team’s attack of the game six minutes into their match against Manchester City. The visitors sprung a counter on the right flank, and Son made no mistake from close range. While his goal gave Tottenham an early advantage over the reigning champions, his elation wouldn’t last long. Three minutes later City’s free kick deflected off his shin and whizzed past his own keeper Guglielmo Vicario. It was his first career own goal – he’ll be hoping it’s the last.
Heroic performance of the week
In a weekend filled with highs and lows, Everton’s 1-0 win over Nottingham Forest slipped under the radar. Sean Dyche’s side earned their first win since they had 10 Premier League points deducted for breaching the financial fair play rules. It’s hard not to see this as the start of their Cinderella story. For a club fighting a huge battle, Everton played tight, resilient football. Against all odds, the squad came together and delivered a solid 1-0 performance with extra credit given to McNeil for an outstanding goal. Should they have got a few more goals than they did? Probably. But now that hope has been reinvigorated, they could be the surprise underdogs of the season.
The VAR controversy of the week
No Premier League weekend goes by without a questionable VAR call. And this week were treated to some real doozies. Despite the plethora of calls to choose from, a baffling moment late in the Chelsea-Brighton game topped the list. While Brighton were down 2-3, they held the momentum after scoring in the second minute of added time. Then, the ball hit Levi Colwill’s face and bounced out of play behind goal. The VAR official advised the referee to check the on-field monitor. A penalty for Brighton was initially awarded, but the decision was reversed and Chelsea were given a drop ball. Confused? So was everyone in the ground. Brighton should have been awarded a corner, and had one last chance to put the ball in the box to try to score an equalizer.
