After a weekend spent starting another war in the Middle East, the United States Secretary of Defense — gosh, sorry, I mean the United States SECRETARY OF WAR — made an appearance in front of the nation on Monday morning.
And if anyone was hoping for reassurance from Pete Hegseth at this juncture, they weren’t about to get it, because apparently his entire speech had been written by a teenage boy in between lengthy stints of launching raids on Counter Strike.