When I was eagerly awaiting my baby’s arrival my algorithm was overflowing with advice, hacks, dos and definitely don’ts. Some tips are useful. But some can fuel a sense of inadequacy.
Take swaddling. We’re told it can lead to safer, more settled sleep; how it can stop babies waking themselves with the startle reflex. Swaddling looks so simple: fold the material, lay your baby in the centre, tuck in one side, then the other, and voila: a perfectly snug baby burrito. I thought: “I’ll definitely do that.”
And believe me, I tried. But something was always off. Instead of remaining bound by his side, my son’s little hand would ping above his head, the end of the blanket would untuck and his cosy cocoon would unravel. I felt like Joey Tribbiani in Friends attempting to learn French. Each individual action, combined, just didn’t work.
If your little one hasn’t arrived yet, don’t read the next sentence
Nothing can prepare you for the pure exhaustion of the newborn stage. (You read it, didn’t you? I’m sorry to tell you it’s true.)
When you’re delirious with a tiredness you’ve never previously known, you don’t have the patience for baby-blanket origami. You need ease and simplicity, maybe more than at any other time in your life.
The good news is that there’s a hack for that. A zip-up sleep swaddle quickly became my son’s default sleepwear. A reassuringly snug-but-not-tight fit meant it would stay put all night while imitating the environment that he had grown used to: the snug confines of the womb. Zero wrapping – and therefore zero skill – is required.
My favourite feature in a sleep swaddle is its two-way zip. It’s a stroke of design genius that I now deem non-negotiable. It allows for stealthy nappy changes without fully waking your drowsy little one in the night. Sleepwear with a one-way zip was promptly retired.
Don’t forget your TOGs
Thermal overall grade, that is. You’ll hear a lot about TOG ratings, which grade the warmth of materials worn by babies at night. A TOG rating can reassure parents their newborn is the ideal temperature without layers of loose blankets, which the Red Nose Foundation advises against for babies under 12 months.
I found using a guide to TOG ratings was the easiest way to get my son’s cosy-levels right and ensure longer periods of uninterrupted sleep for both of us. Choose the season, room temperature and size of your child to find the right bed clothes for them. Also look for the natural fibres that delicate baby skin often prefers, which you can find readily in Australia, particularly in baby sizes.
As time goes on, you will begin to realise what works for both you and your baby. As my son approaches two, he’s more wriggly than ever. He still goes to bed cosy, but these days he’s sporting a TOG-rated ergoPouch sleep suit, with legs, so he can roll around until he finds the perfect sleeping position.
Fortunately, the constant wake-ups are a distant memory for us. But if you’re in the thick of it, rest assured there’s not a parent in the world who does not feel your pain. A bitter-sweet consolation: you’re never in any stage of parenthood for long. This too shall pass.
