Dear God, did you read about that gang shootout in an old people’s home in east London the other day? Maybe you did not, because it was weirdly under-reported in the news but… horrible. Just horrible. Tons of shots fired. Loads of people dead. “I peed myself four or five times,” said one of the residents, Wilfred, who was there as the two gangs happily blasted away at each other across the lounge area where he and lots of others were happily playing bridge. “Though that happens a fair bit these days anyway, to be honest.”
In reality, of course, the scene did not take place. Can you imagine if it did? Even Sadiq “My thoughts are with the family” Khan would surely be spurred into getting more than a little medieval on crime. It would be on the front pages of all the papers for weeks. Tanks would be parked on the lawns of every hospice in the land.
