The firearms officer who shot innocent Jean Charles de Menezes in a botched police operation in the wake of the London 7/7 bombings has spoken out for the first time and admitted he would never want to meet his victim’s family.
The 27-year-old Brazilian electrician, who was not carrying a backpack, was on his way to work when two firearms officers fired seven bullets into his head and one into his shoulder after they mistook him for a suicide bomber.
The incident at Stockwell Underground station on 22 July 2005 sparked one the biggest crises in British policing, culminating in the Metropolitan Police being fined £560,000 for endangering the public.
Speaking out for the first time in a new documentary ahead of the 20th anniversary of the shooting, the firearms officer known as C12 has admitted he has no intention of ever meeting de Menezes’ family, fearing the emotional impact could “make my life a bit unbearable”.
He described the constant worry as like a “weeping sore” but said the Brazilian man’s family were the real victims.
“I’m suffering in a way, but in no way would I count my suffering as their suffering,” he said.
“At the moment the person that I shot, I can’t really remember them, I don’t remember any facial features so in a way it’s lessened the potential impact it’s had on me.
“And I don’t think I would like to open any closets which would make my life a bit unbearable. I know that sounds really, really selfish but that’s how I feel.
“I have been brutally honest about why we did what we did. I just hope they are words enough to explain our actions for that day.”
Speaking about the moment he pulled the trigger, the officer said he was “100 per cent convinced that we were all about to die” and he and his “brother in arms”, known as C2, would have to live with their decision for the rest of their lives.
The officer, who recently retired after 40 years in the Met, said: “It’s our duty to fully explain to a family in a respectful way why we acted how we acted.
“Everything told me, everything told me that I was going to die, everything, and that’s why I acted like I did. And it transpires that wasn’t the case. How do you think I’ll feel after that?”
Police following Mr de Menezes wrongly believed he was one of four men who had failed to detonate bombs on the capital’s transport system the day before. The failed attempt by Hussein Osman, who lived in the same building as Mr de Menezes, and three others had come just two weeks after four suicide bombers struck London, killing 52 people.
In the wake of the shooting reports claimed Mr de Menezes had run from police and vaulted the barriers at Stockwell tube, but C12 confirmed this was a mistake by eyewitnesses who had seen him leap the barrier in pursuit.
Documents later leaked by the then-police watchdog, the Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC), revealed Mr de Menezes had used his Oyster card to enter the station and taken a seat on the train before he was shot.
The armed officer said he was instructed to stop Mr de Menezes getting on the tube with the codeword “state red, state red” after he was followed by surveillance officers from the building where the suspected terrorist lived.
He recalled aiming his gun at the 27-year-old who had got out of his seat and shouting “armed police”, but said he continued to move towards him.
C12 said “time seemed to slow down” as he fired the bullets at Mr de Menezes, which left him covered with blood and “debris”. When he was eventually allowed to shower, he washed bone splinters out of his hair, he added.
Police later discovered an ID card on Mr de Menezes and realised they had shot an innocent man. The real suspect, Osman, was arrested in Rome a week later.
C12 said his daughter would wake at night and he struggled with crippling headaches from stress as the fallout from the shooting unfolded.
“I’ve always seen policing good versus evil in clear defined terms – we’re the goodies, you’ve got to fight the baddies for the benefit of good people in society,” he said.
“Never thought, oh, we’d have to face a situation like a turn from being a goodie to suddenly being a suspect in the case. As a police officer, if you’re charged with an offence, your life is over.”
His comments come amid widespread controversy over the trial of firearms Martyn Blake, who was last month acquitted of murdering Chris Kaba in a police shooting in September 2022.
No individual officers were charged over the shooting of Mr de Menezes, but the Met was found guilty of health and safety failures for a series of errors during the botched operation, which was led Cressida Dick.
A Met Police spokesperson said the incident has been scrutinised in multiple inquiries and all IPCC recommendations had been implemented immediately.
“The shooting of Jean Charles de Menezes is a matter of very deep regret to the Metropolitan Police Service. Our thoughts remain with his family and we reiterate our apology to them,” the force said.
“No officer sets out on duty intent on ending a life. Our sole purpose is the complete opposite – the protection and preservation of life – and we have taken extensive action to address the causes of this tragedy.”
Shoot to Kill: Terror on the Tube will air on Channel 4 at 9pm on Sunday 10 and Monday 11 November.
