After a mid-race clash with World Champion Mathieu van der Poel during the World Cup in Gavere, Costa Rican Felipe Nystrom is so ashamed that he has threatened to give up on the rest of his racing calendar and head home.
"I don't really deserve to be here," Nystrom said after the incident on lap three when he stopped to engage with his fans and turned to get back on course just as Van der Poel was storming past. The rainbow jersey holder had to push on Nystrom to keep from crashing.
"I feel terrible," Nystrom said, according to Sporza. "It was 1,000% my fault what happened there. Mathieu had to push me - it should have been even harder. I was in the way and I feel very bad about it."
Nystrom is a fan favourite in Belgium after inspiring people with his story of overcoming childhood abuse, depression, homelessness, drug abuse and suicide attempts. Cyclocross was a way to meet new friends after he relocated to Portland, Oregon and he quickly rose through the ranks, although he races more to inspire more Costa Ricans than to be competitive.
During the race in Gavere, Nystrom stopped for a selfie with a fan and appeared unaware that Van der Poel was coming in fast to lap him well before the halfway point of the race.
The video of the incident is not the way Nystrom would have preferred to go viral.
"Some people tell me I'm stupid, but others say Van der Poel was mean and didn't have to push me. It's horrible that he would experience a negative impact from a situation I put him in. I wish that I could look Mathieu in the eye and say how sorry I am."
Nystrom has paid for his own trips to race in Europe over the past few years through online fundraisers. This season he's included compatriot Joseph Ramirez in the initiative to get two Costa Ricans to the World Championships in Tabor.
Now, Nystrom is so mortified he wants to leave Belgium.
"I had a dream and I achieved it, but my mistake on Tuesday is too big for me to continue. Normally I would have had the means to continue until the World Championships, but now I'm just going to leave next week.
"I'm going to give the other Costa Rican one last push in Hulst [the World Cup on December 30 - ed.] and then he has to take over the torch. I have to bear the consequences of my actions, I have disappointed people," Nystrom said.
But the World Champion responded to his contrition with forgiveness and asked him not to go.
"I know Felipe Nystrom's story and have sympathy for him," Van der Poel said to Sporza.
"Yesterday, however, he gave me a scare. I initially thought he had pulled over to let me through until he suddenly wanted to leave when I was at the same position. I pushed to keep myself straight and not get his bike in my face," Van der Poel said.
After hearing that Nystrom wanted to quit his campaign, Van der Poel said that it wasn't necessary. "I wasn't mad at him either. Felipe made an error in judgment and that can happen. Everyone makes a mistake sometimes. He should certainly not give up his dream for that. I hope he stays here and continues to complete his planned program."
