When Sandra started to fall in love with Daniel*, it was easy to overlook the warning signs.
Nine years ago, they were barely noticeable.
"I thought it was because he was scared — not jealous — but scared of losing me," she said.
Within months of dating, after meeting in Alice Springs, Daniel's behaviour shifted from loving to controlling.
"I was timed from when I would leave work to when I got home," Sandra said.
"If we went out, I would only be allowed to speak when he allowed me to … I couldn't be my happy, bubbly self."
When Sandra realised her new romance had taken a sinister turn, it was too late.
By then, Daniel knew when to shower her with love and when to say sorry, and he knew which buttons to push that would hurt her the most.
'I was going to die in this relationship'
After Sandra gave birth to their second child, a daughter, she said Daniel's behaviour became increasingly violent.
"He became real possessive of me," she said.
During the course of their tumultuous relationship, Sandra said Daniel smashed more than 15 of her mobile phones, convinced that she was cheating on him.
"He hit me one time in front of the kids and he knew that broke me," she said.
"He said it was my fault."
Over time, Daniel's violence escalated.
After years of court battles, mediation sessions and triple-0 calls, Sandra is now in a stable relationship with a new partner who treats her with respect.
She's one of the lucky ones.
Federal funding falls short, say NT women's safety workers
In Australia, one woman a week on average is murdered by her current or former partner.
Those figures are worse in the Northern Territory, and worse again for Aboriginal women like Sandra.
Data from the NT Gender Equality Framework 2019-2024 shows the NT has the highest rates of domestic and family violence in the country.
Aboriginal women in the NT are hospitalised for assault at 40 times the rate of non-Indigenous women.
Despite the NT's disproportionately high rates of domestic violence, federal funding for NT support services continues to be based on population size rather than demand.
Last month, federal Minister for Families and Social Services Anne Ruston announced an extra $10.7 million for domestic violence services in the NT.
It means the NT will now receive a total of $15.5 million in domestic and family violence federal funding this year.
Ms Ruston said the additional funding would allow NT services to provide training for frontline staff, early intervention programs for young people and tailored services for women in remote communities.
Women's Safety Services of Central Australia CEO Larissa Ellis said she welcomed the one-off funding boost as recognition of the "unacceptable" rates of domestic violence in the NT.
However, she said the NT required a long-term funding commitment based on demand rather than population size to enact meaningful change.
"Those smaller states that provide services in remote areas will always be disadvantaged by a population-based model, rather than a needs-based model," Ms Ellis said.
"How do you go up against NSW or Victoria?"
Instead of redistributing funding from other states, Ms Ellis said she wanted the federal government to increase its total funding base altogether.
"We need to argue for a bigger pie — not a bigger slice of the pie — but a bigger pie," she said.
Why the Territory is different
Ms Ellis said the Territory was unique due to its high demand for services, and its sparse and linguistically diverse population spread across remote and rural areas.
"We need to attract suitable people here by paying them more and we need to get into communities which, again, costs more."
Ms Ellis said more funding was also required to support grassroots initiatives led by Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander communities.
"This is not a one-size-fits-all [situation] and I think what fits in an inner-metropolitan context does not fit in a remote, rural area," she said.
"We need to maintain a standard. We want to be providing a service that's on par with metropolitan services."
In a statement to the ABC, Territory Families Minister Kate Worden said the one-off federal funding contribution was the result of 12 months of lobbying the federal government for a needs-based funding approach.
She said the NT government spends $25 million a year on tackling domestic violence.
Part of that funding goes toward running 13 women's safe houses in remote communities and 16 women's refuges and shelters, she said.
Ms Worden said the NT government recently announced a further $15 million for domestic and family violence services, plus an additional $7.5 million for new crisis accommodation in Palmerston.
*Daniel is not his real name.
