I've done a lot of talks in recent days to try to help people in Mental Health awareness week and one of the subjects that tends to come up is gay men hiding, particularly in sport, or struggling to come to terms with their sexuality - just like I myself did in my teens and through my twenties.
In the customary Q&A sessions that follow, I'm often asked 'Why footballers don't come out?'
Everyone is waiting to find out who the first big Premier League star will be. I always reply it's a matter of when, not if.
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Since then, the young Blackpool player Jake Daniels became the first active male professional to do so, saying he wished to 'break the stigma' and wanting to be honest with everyone so he could 'be myself.'
Crikey, I can identify with young Jake and I greatly admire his honesty and openness. Yes, he will come across a minority of people who are homophobic and critical of him, but I'd like to think the vast majority will be hugely supportive. Indeed I'm sure they will be. We've already seen that with people like Gary Lineker and various clubs at differing levels of the game commending Jake and offering their own staunch backing.
The important thing for Jake, and I speak from personal experience here, is that he will be feeling a whole lot better in himself today than he would have been in trying to hide a secret. I've been there. To me, at 19, it was unnatural to have the kind of feelings that I did, I was struggling, didn't want to be gay. I was trying to fight against myself. I worried how those close to me and my friends, and indeed the macho world of rugby union would respond to, or be acceptant of, a gay referee.
My concerns, in hindsight, were totally unfounded. My loved ones, and the rugby community, and indeed the public at large, not only in Wales but also throughout the UK and the world, have been incredibly supportive. Because I was happier within myself, not trying to pretend to be someone I wasn't, I was able to relax more and became a better referee as a result. I went on to referee the World Cup final, the very top of my profession.
There is no way I would have been able to achieve that if I hadn't accepted who I was and, just as importantly, been accepted by others.
This 'be yourself' mantra applies whether you are a rugby referee, a player like Gareth Thomas, a footballer like Jake, a civil servant, you work in a bank, labourer, whatever. Being happier within yourself, creating an environment where people understand and respect you, helps you to acclimatise quicker and be better at your job. Whatever that occupation may be.
We've seen with people like myself and Alfie how respectful, understanding and acceptant the sport of rugby is. Football is by and large unchartered territory, players have been reluctant to come out for fear of discrimination, chants from opposition supporters on the terraces and the effect this could have on themselves and their team.
I get that. Trust me I've had the odd comment thrown my way. You get a tiny minority of people like that in rugby. There clearly will be similar in football, too, and, despite still being a small minority, the numbers will be larger simply because it is such a massive global sport.
But at these Q&A sessions I always say the vast majority of people in football are very decent and that when someone does come out, whatever level they play at, that vast majority will be very supportive. We're seeing that with Jake and hopefully his courage will show football, like rugby, to be a sport for everyone where inclusiveness and diversity plays a huge part.
There are areas where things differ. Because of its global nature, football is played in countries like Qatar, where the World Cup is staged later this year amid well documented homophobic views out there. You will always get people who don't accept gay people because of what's entrenched into them at a young age. You just have to understand that.
Then you have football fans chanting things from the terraces, often somewhat uncouth. I really hope young Jake doesn't receive any of that kind of abuse.
If he does, I also hope the supportive fans drown out those discriminatory voices and in effect police it themselves. They shouldn't just stand by and accept it. Even if nothing nasty is meant by it, that doesn't make it acceptable either. I always say not only do we each have a responsibility in what we do or say as individuals, but also a responsibility to ensure we don't just stand back and do nothing when we hear or see something that is blatantly wrong and totally unacceptable.
The truth is it doesn't matter if you're in a football changing room, an office, on a building site or wherever, you should feel free to get on with what you love doing best and be yourself in doing so. As I say, hide inner secrets and you won't excel.
Jake might have worried about being found out, or tried to avoid team situations where something might have been said that made him uncomfortable within. This affects you mentally, has a knock-on effect upon how you train or play. Or in my case referee.
But he's been open and up front and put any of that to bed for good. He'll be better for it, I guarantee that.
That doesn't mean every gay footballer should suddenly feel under pressure to come out. Nobody should be forced into doing anything. I've spoken to one or two semi-pro players and community players in football and rugby myself who tell me they are still struggling with their secrets, but don't feel ready to come out. I fully understand and respect that.
What everyone needs is an environment around them where they can be comfortable in their own skin. Others may follow in Jake's footsteps, others might not. It's an individual choice.
But we always knew there were gay footballers. It's no big deal for me. Nor for lots of others. That said, young Jake's courage is to be applauded.
The world of football has rallied round. As I always felt it would anyway, whenever this were to happen.
Jake is the first, but he won't be the last.
