ONE thing this correspondent is not very good at is... oh, hold on a minute, I may have to rephrase that sentence in the interests of accuracy. Among the many things this correspondent is not very good at is admin. I mean, I’m genuinely hopeless at it. My filing system, for instance, is so chaotic, it resembles a cabinet that was ransacked during the bloomin’ Watergate break-ins.
I’ll jot important contact details down on spare bits of paper that are strewn about in wild abandon then use those same bits of paper to scribble together a shopping list. The result is a slightly abstract canvas upon which the mobile number for a Scottish tour player of high standing could be partly obscured by the name of a squirty household cleaning agent that’s good at removing stubborn limescale.
As for the annual palaver of completing the tax return? Well, it’s such an arduous, groan-inducing burden, it actually feels like every hole on the form has to be filled in with a shovel. All of this, of course, has absolutely nothing to do with golf. But then, when have the opening meanderings in this column ever had anything to do with golf? Like my admin, it tends to be a riot of confusion.
