Nick Green died suddenly in November 2021, aged just 35, tragically just days before his partner of four years Gemma Walters gave birth to their first child. What should have been the happiest time of their lives turned to heartbreak when Nick collapsed from an undiagnosed heart condition and died at the gym where he was a regular.
Giving birth alone piled on the agony for Gemma, 39, who lives in Borrowash, Derbyshire, but life got even harder for the grieving mum when she went to register new-born daughter Olivia's birth and was told that Nick could not be on the birth certificate because the couple were not married. That news began a nightmare that has cost her thousands of pounds and has involved a DNA test and a hearing in the High Court.
Tears frequently interrupting Gemma's words, she told Derbyshire Live that the period the pair spent as a couple before Nick's death was a "magical time". She said: "Everything was going well with the pregnancy, we had everything set up and in place and Nick was so looking forward to being a father for the first time.
Is the government doing enough to help with the cost of living? Let us know
"He used to sing songs to Olivia in the womb and he was so excited. It's just so cruel he never saw her and she will never know her daddy. Those first few months are a blur and in the middle of it, I was told the law stopped me from putting Nick's name on the certificate. So I had to register Olivia as having no father. If we had been married, I could have registered her for both of us, or Nick could have if he had lived.
"Instead, as an unmarried couple, we both have to be present for the registration of the birth, which is obviously impossible if one part of the couple is dead. So instead, I have to obtain a DNA test and a judge at the High Court has to issue what is called a declaration of parentage, when they are satisfied that he is the child's father and that the registration can be completed. When that is completed and I have a court order, I will be able to re-register the birth."
Gemma, who suffers some ill-health and occasionally uses a wheelchair, says she has no issue with having to arrange a DNA test but that she also has to provide witness statements from 10 people who can testify that Nick wanted to be a dad. For the first 15 months after his death, she struggled to get a solicitor and judge to take on the case.
But now she said: "I have already been to the first High Court hearing in which a judge was assigned and a second hearing set for April 26, when the judge will explain about the DNA test that is needed and the witness statements. The evidence will be presented at a third hearing and then a fourth hearing the decision will be announced."
According to Gemma, the whole legal process is expected to cost just over £4,000. That's £960 for each court hearing and the cost of the DNA test and for an official from the laboratory to attend to swear the sample is correct. She is hoping to raise some of the funding via a GoFundMe page that she has set up.
She said: "I have been lucky that family and friends have been able to help with some of the funding so I don't have to ask for all of it. But I never dreamed that wanting Nick's name on the certificate would be so complicated and expensive and I am sure other people are not aware until it happens to them, which I hope it never does.
"I can understand that someone unscrupulous might put someone's name on a certificate without their permission and where there is a monetary gain but for ordinary people like us that's not the case. It seems a very sick and twisted situation, and too much red tape, from my point of view.
"To me, Nick is her daddy and should be named. It's what he would want. I was not going to ask for help but life is already a massive struggle with a young child, grieving and also moving to the bungalow where I am now. I knew that night when he didn't arrive home for his tea on time that something was wrong. I went to find him and discovered the emergency services were working on him. I collapsed and ended up in hospital until I gave birth 11 days later in what was a very lonely experience.
"It still feels lonely without Nick. I spend my whole life upset as just want him here with us, where he should be. Right now, I feel as if I cannot breathe properly until I can get this sorted and Nick's name is in its rightful place. I know when she is old enough to understand, Olivia will be glad I fought for this instead of having to explain why her loving daddy's name is not on her birth certificate."
READ NEXT:
DWP warning for anyone on Universal Credit expecting £301 cost of living payment this month
Villagers concerned as plans for new traveller site tipped for approval
PIP and Universal Credit among 12 DWP benefits to be paid early
Michael Mosley's faster weight loss advice lists three fruits to 'avoid' on diet
