The children of a GP who mysteriously went missing 11 years ago have spoken out for the first time to say they feel no anger or bitterness towards their dad, only sympathy for whatever mental turmoil drove him to leave them.
Dr David Lidgey left a handwritten note on the kitchen table saying 'gone for a walk' on June 29, 2011 and has not been seen since.
He left his phone, wallet, watch, car keys, credit cards, passport and even the the loose change from his pockets when he walked out of his home in Norfolk.
His fellow doctor wife Shona and their three children, Ruth, Arthur and Tom, were left not knowing what happened to him as extensive searches, and missing person appeals brought them no closer to the truth.
Shona, who is now officially his widow, says the mystery of his disappearance is like a agonising open wound, as they have no way of knowing if his is alive or dead.
In 2018, seven years after David vanished she received text messages out of the blue with one reading "You will see me again soon" but the family were left distraught once more when the identity of the person who sent them was not established.
Police confirmed the number, which is no longer in service, was used in the London area but gave no further clues.
Shona said she had no idea if they messages were a cruel prank but she felt they were from David, who she feels is still alive.
His daughter Ruth, who is now 26 and working in university admissions said she is keen to know what happened to her dad.
"When someone dies, you can grieve and move on, but when someone you love goes missing there is nothing but uncertainty, even though life carries on," she told the Mail.
"If he's alive, I would like to have him back in our lives in some way, no matter how difficult that might be for all of us."
Son Arthur, who is a personal trainer and nutritionist, thinks his dad is dead, adding: "I can't see how a person can live for so long, completely off radar, without leaving any trace, but I would like some kind of resolution."
Speaking to the Mirror back in 2012, Shona said David had suffered from depression since he was a young doctor and had been battling another dark episode before he went missing.
In his lowest moments he had talked about suicide, saying his family would be better off without him.
She said: "I used to have a recurring dream of David walking through the door and the kids flinging themselves on him and the tears of relief.
“I don’t have that so much now and part of me feels guilty, while the other part feels it’s healthy because if he had died this would be normal.
“But in my gut I’m sure David is alive. Sometimes I talk to him. I sit here and say, ‘Where are you’?”
Shona and David met on a GP training course and married in 1995.
He was a devoted dad who loved playing boisterous games with the children and instilling his love of sport.
But while he continued to work as a doctor, he also had periods of depression and insecurity that he hid from everyone except Shona.
The bouts would improve with time, but despite urging his own patients to seek psychiatric help, David refused to do so himself – fearing it could affect his career and his colleagues’ view of him.
Shona says: “Of course, that wasn’t true because his care would have been confidential and the medical profession deals with this illness every day.
"But David felt he had to deal with the condition in his own way – an all-too common male approach to depression.
“The irony is he was very good at helping other depressed people. Ex-patients have phoned me up saying how wonderful he was with them.
“It’s so sad his pride didn’t allow him to take that help himself.”
Early in 2011 David fell into another depressive episode.
The family had moved from London to Norfolk four years earlier and although Shona and the children had all settled well and made new friends, he missed his old job in capital and could only find some part-time work.
Shona says: “The move didn’t work out for him, but I also feel that he had some unresolved problems that had been building for years.”
On the morning of June 29, David dropped the children at school. He sent Shona a text to say he was not going to work and she assumed he felt too unwell.
A neighbour saw him return home 40 minutes later but when Shona got in from work, he had gone.
David’s details are on the website of the charity Missing People. Shona urges him to make contact through them if he is not ready to call her.
“All I can say, and keep saying, is ‘David, please, please, come back. We love you very much’."
