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The Guardian - AU
The Guardian - AU
Lifestyle
Eleanor Gordon-Smith

‘My teenage children are bright but unmotivated. How much should I get involved with their school work?’

18th-century oil painting of a woman holding a large book, surrounded by young children clamouring about her
‘Great texts and one-on-one education can really wake up a certain kind of kid. But that isn’t the only kind of “waking up”’. Painting: Allegory of Wisdom and Science by James Miller, 1798. Photograph: WAVE: The Museums, Galleries and Archives of Wolverhampton/Getty Images

I have teenagers of 12 and 14 and am struggling to work out how involved I should be with their school work. They are bright and I clearly want them to succeed in what they choose to do, but they are also fairly unmotivated and, probably like many teenagers, don’t put their all into their school work.

Friends have different perspectives but it sounds like a lot of people are arranging tutoring for their children. I’m not sure mine would enjoy this on top of school and homework but am I holding them back by not supporting them with this? Does there come a point when you just need to sit back a little and let them take ownership of their decisions and behaviour, or is this still too young? I’m sure every child is different and every parent is different too.

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