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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Comment
Gaia Neiman

My immigrant mother can’t stop saying thank you. Why does that make me uncomfortable?

Thank-you cards pinned to a wall
‘Her time in England feels like a debt, a favour she has to return.’ Photograph: Dimitris Legakis/Athena Pictures

On the day of the last general election, my mother rose at 5am to head to the polling station. With any kind of voting, she volunteers her days off from work to help out with the ballots. Although she can’t vote in this country.

My mother feels patriotic about her country of origin, Italy, but her home has been England for the past 15 years. She has a British partner, holds legal residence in the UK, and has been paying British taxes as long as she has been here. She never felt fully accepted by people in this country. She is often talked down to because of her accent, although her English is proficient. She also finds some difficulty with everyday things, such as worrying about being understood by her manager or applying for pension assistance – struggling with everything from British humour, to the country’s administration. And she still feels that, as an immigrant, she needs to prove something.

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