My husband persuaded me to swing. I’m desperate to do it again, he’s not – what should I do?

‘Sometimes that’s part of the fun in sexual experience – having spaces where you can be wholly committed to just one of your many modes.’ Painting: Winter or the Saturnalia (1783) by Antoine-Francois Callet. Photograph: Heritage Image Partnership Ltd/Alamy

My husband took many years to persuade me to go to a swingers club. I eventually said I would try it. I have a 60-year-old body but it’s OK and I wasn’t shy; I love nudist beaches, I just wasn’t sure I’d like having sex with other men. Well, when I got there, I was like a kid in a sweet shop! I felt desired and sexy!

My husband wasn’t so lucky and didn’t get to swing at all so was very disappointed. I’m desperate to do it all again but he’s not so keen. I can’t get that feeling of utter depravity, sexual delight and total satisfaction out of my head! What should I do?

Eleanor says: There’s something so Greek tragic about being the instigator of swinging who doesn’t ultimately get to swing. What a car ride home!