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The Guardian - AU
The Guardian - AU
Lifestyle
Eleanor Gordon-Smith

My first relationship just ended. How can I expect to find someone else when it took 15 years to find her?

Eleanor Gustave Courbet
Painting: The Wounded Man by Gustave Courbet.
‘My self-esteem and confidence wasn’t exactly soaring before I met her, but now I feel even less so,’ writes a reader. Painting: The Wounded Man by Gustave Courbet. Illustration: Gustave Courbet (1819–1877)/Wikimedia Commons

I’m nearly 30 and my first serious relationship just ended a month ago. It lasted eight months, she was my first girlfriend and first kiss, etc. She broke up with me in a very kind and respectful way, and I have been … OK, I guess.

The thing is, everyone has been saying to me, “But you must feel so much more confident now.” I don’t. My self-esteem and confidence wasn’t exactly soaring before I met her, but now I feel even less so. It just feels like most people are less tolerant or accepting of my shortcomings.

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