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The Guardian - AU
The Guardian - AU
Lifestyle
Jasper Peach

‘My body is fat, not wrong’: how body neutrality – not positivity – helped me shed a lifetime of shame

Jasper Peach with pink hair and glasses wears a patterned scarf and denim jacket outdoors
Australian author Jasper Peach: ‘I see body neutrality as being similar to being cold and getting a jumper: you’d neither celebrate nor criticise someone for feeling cold’. Photograph: Amy Woodward

In 1981 the CD was born and so was I. Both arrivals were surprising and have drifted in and out of fashion ever since. As a baby, my majestic “chonk lord” status was cause for celebration and an indication of prosperity. But from a young age I noticed that my presence seemed to offend other people. When I was seven, I remember asking to have a go at skipping, after having turned the rope for everyone else. One child enlightened me on why I couldn’t: I was too fat to skip.

Children learn hierarchy from adults and then their peers. Who belongs, who doesn’t and why. My classmates learned from adults to see me as something to mock and despise. Even my own well-meaning father once sat me down and told me that nobody would love, trust or employ me due to my body shape. This didn’t shock me; I’d already picked up what everyone was putting down.

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