A mum-to-be went for a routine scan and found out her baby's heart condition was so severe she wouldn't survive.
Lucy Livesey was 20 weeks pregnant when she was taken into a private room at St Mary's Hospital in Manchester in 2017.
The shocked expectant mum was instantly reminded of the time in 2004 when she was told her twin brother had died, reports the Manchester Evening News.
Her unborn daughter Ellie had developed a heart problem and medics were unsure whether she had a chance at life.
Following multiple tests and an agonising three-week wait, Lucy and her partner Rick were told their baby’s heart had not formed properly and her condition was too severe.
At 24 weeks Lucy went into labour and delivered her child.
“Delivering your own child when you know they aren’t going to be alive is really messed up,” the 33-year-old said.
“You’re just in absolute shock because you get told that news then you’re scared about what’s going to happen next.
"You’re a first-time mum never having delivered a baby before.
“You’re also then trying to look to the future about all of the things you’re not going to have or get to have.
"It’s a whole mixed bag of emotions – you're in that moment of a devastating time but your mind is trying to problem solve a situation.
“It was disbelief at the time and a lot of guilt thinking it was something I did wrong; you start thinking if you could have eaten better or done something differently.”
Lucy and Rick had already started baby shopping before they were given the news.
Ahead of the delivery, the pair spent time packing away the tiny pink outfits and blankets in a box.
On the way to hospital, Lucy recalls clutching her belly, not wanting to let her baby go.
The couple decided to have a hypno birth, a method of pain management that can be used during labour which involves using a mixture of visualisation, relaxation and deep breathing techniques.
The couple were then able to spend some precious time with Ellie.
In the days following the labour, Lucy’s pregnancy symptoms continued, as though her body yearned for a baby it couldn’t find.
“When we found out it was a girl, it was really exciting,” she said.
“We hadn’t gone crazy but we had little outfits and blankets and things.
"You already plan lots in your mind – you even plan wedding dress shopping with her, you go that far into the future.
“I have two boys now and they’re beautiful boys but we’ve decided at this point that might be it for us.
"Then there’s that realisation that there won’t ever be another girl in our life like Ellie was.
“You have all the symptoms, like you’re bleeding and you feel sore.
"I was still getting push notifications of emails from all the baby stuff I signed up to.
“After the delivery we ended up spending some time with Ellie.
"I felt like I bonded with her and we have some pictures and photographs and that made it really special.
“I felt so empowered from the birth itself. I felt really proud of what we both achieved – even thought it was sad, we did create a life,” she added.
Lucy took sick leave from work before eventually setting up wellness business Relax With Lucy & Co, a service which offers baby loss well-being and mental health support.
