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Liverpool Echo
Liverpool Echo
Entertainment
Jess Flaherty

Mum slammed for 'stealing spotlight' after announcing pregnancy on cousin's engagement

A new mum has been slammed for "stealing" her cousin's "spotlight" after announcing her pregnancy on the same day as her cousin's engagement.

The mum is part of an extended family group chat that's primarily used for planning big events, and sharing important news with one another. After radio silence for a little while, her auntie asked if anyone had any "life updates to share", to which her cousin replied and shared the news of her engagement.

Her cousin has been with her partner for seven years so was very excited to announce that she was engaged. After everyone, including the mum, shared their congratulations, the mum then shared she was pregnant.

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This was equally met with congratulations and excitement from the entire family, including the cousin - though this changed a few days later. The mum received a "long paragraph" from her cousin who was "absolutely furious" and accused her of "stealing her spotlight announcing [her] pregnancy on the same day as her engagement".

Not wanting to rock the boat or cause any further upset, the mum "immediately apologised" to her and "felt so guilty" about the situation. She never heard back from her cousin, and they didn't speak for the rest of her pregnancy.

This then caused a wedge between the mum's mum and her auntie - her cousin's mum - as they've each taken sides. By coincidence, the mum's new baby was born on the same day as her cousin's 30th birthday.

In a bid to minimise further fallout, the mum "couldn't bring" herself to announce her daughter's birth for fear of "stealing" her cousin's spotlight on her 30th birthday. Now, she feels torn over her right to celebrate her baby's birth.

Taking to Reddit's popular Am I The A**hole thread, she sought advice on whether she was in the wrong to make her pregnancy announcement when she did. Her post was met with a range of replies from fellow Reddit users, keen to share their thoughts.

One said: "Firstly, you were just answering a question, same as your cousin. Secondly, I find it bizarre that society seems to think only one person is allowed news at a time.

"Thirdly, I also find it weird people seem to think you can only be happy for one person at a time. Fourthly, it's been months and there's a new baby, and people are still sore about an announcement? It's not like you stood up whilst she was saying her vows and interrupted. You just followed one exciting announcement with another. Time to move on IMO [in my opinion]."

Another said: "NTA [not the a**hole] - you guys were asked about life updates. You gave a life update. It's no big deal. Your cousin needs to chill out. Also go ahead and tell them about your kid being born. You have every right to want to share the news of your child being born with your family".

A third said: "I'm going to say NTA, your aunt asked and you both responded. It's not like she out of the blue announced it and you announced your pregnancy as well at that time. I would have just messaged people individually on the birth announcement, but even if you did it in the group chat wouldn't have mattered, which 30 yo [year old] makes a big deal about their birthday?"

And another commented: "NTA at all. Why on Earth is your cousin's engagement more significant than your pregnancy? And even if it was bad form to announce your pregnancy right after she announced the engagement, you apologised as soon as you learned that it hurt her. And she didn't talk to you for the rest of your pregnancy. What is that? Announce the birth of your child. Starting a life is as significant as living one for 30 years. You have every right to celebrate your life, please don't let your aunt or your cousin make you believe that you're less important than she is".

Another added: "NTA look I get it your cousin wants to have her moment but it's not like you announced it at her wedding. Her reaction afterwards to you however and the rift she has caused by overreacting makes her TA [the a**hole]. You were asked for big news and you shared your news, yes you could have waited but why would you need to. If you had announced your pregnancy first would she have not announced her engagement?"

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