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Daily Mirror
Daily Mirror
Paige Freshwater

Mum's heartache after son with ADHD is only child not invited to birthday party

Nobody likes being excluded - especially when you haven't done anything wrong to warrant it. But one mum has been forced to explain to her five-year-old son why he was the only child in his class not to be invited to a birthday party.

She has been left feeling like she has been "punched in the chest", as she believes her son is being punished for having ADHD, a condition that affects a person's behaviour. Taking to Mumsnet, she wrote: "I know you can invite who you like to parties, but I'm just feeling so upset at the moment. My five-year-old has ADHD and he is seen as 'naughty' due to this by some of the children at school.

It's not the first time her son has been excluded from a party (stock photo) (Getty Images)

"There is a distinct difference between when he is struggling to focus and when he is actually choosing to be naughty, which helps myself and his school manage the behaviour."

The mum says most parents are aware of his behavioural issues - and understand he is "not really being naughty", while others try to keep their children away from him because of it.

"When it was nursery school I tried to not let myself be bothered when he wasn't invited to things, after all you perhaps just choose a few people or don't know everyone," she added.

"I've just found out that two of the children from his class, which he has moved up with from nursery and reception, so all very settled together now, have had a joint birthday party and every child was invited except my son.

"They plastered pictures all over Facebook and I'm 100 per cent that every child in the class was there except my son, plus younger and older siblings and presumably some other friends."

She doesn't understand how an adult could do this to a small child (stock photo) (Getty Images)

What hurt even more was the woman considered the two parents to be her friends, as their children would hang out with each other at school and would even play at each others houses on an evening.

She added: " I know you can invite who you want. This just seems cruel and I'm so so sad for him.

"These children are the ones he comes home and talks about saying they are his best friends and he can't wait to see them and can they come for tea.

"My son doesn't know about the party. He will know tomorrow when they all talk about it at school.

"This has happened before and he has gotten himself very upset and also blamed me for not taking him there."

The mum believes she has now seen her so-called friends' true colours - but doesn't know whether to confront them about keeping his name off the guest list.

While most users shared a thought for her son, others encouraged her to make friends with "more understanding" parents, so her son isn't excluded from another party in the future.

One user said: "That is absolutely horrendous and I would have no issue asking the parents why they'd excluded my child, and bringing it up with the teacher.

"It's is not child-led to exclude one single child, it's the parents."

Another user added: "That’s a really evil thing to do. Those parents knew what they were doing, it'’s spiteful and nasty.

"I wouldn’t say anything to them, but I wouldn’t be overly friendly with them either.

"How would they like it if that was their child? Total lack of empathy

"It’ll soon be forgotten about and whole class parties don't tend to go on for long. Hope your son is ok, bless him."

A third user said: "To exclude him like that is incredibly cruel. You must feel terrible and it’s completely understandable.

"I think I would have to ask the mother why this happened and why he wasn’t invited."

Do you have a story to share? Email paige.freshwater@reachplc.com.

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