A mum was left "very upset" after a teacher suggested her son should cut his long curly hair to avoid being bullied.
The teacher said she was worried the five-year-old would be picked on because other children at school thought he was a girl. The shocked mum took to Mumsnet to air her feelings and received a response from hundreds of other parents.
In the thread, she wrote: "Very upset. DS (dear son) is 5 and has always been a sensitive boy. Gravitates towards girls and has some (traditionally) feminine (as well as some very masculine) interests. He has long, curly hair and big blue eyes. Has been mistaken for a girl since birth irrespective of dressing in typical "boy" clothes.
Read More: Mumsnet debate on children at weddings after mum gets invite but kids are banned
"His teacher has just now brought up that she is worried he will be bullied because apparently the other kids at school think he's a girl. She's suggested he cut his hair.
"DH (dear husband) is all for it. I am not, pure and simply because he doesn't want to. DH has pushed many times and he just doesn't want to. I also don't think he should have to masculinise his interests just because he may or may not be bullied.
"Ultimately, I am obviously horrified at the prospect of him being bullied, but am struggling to understand why he should have to change who he is to fit some kind of stereotype. Don't know what to do, but I am very, very upset about all this. AIBU (am I being unreasonable) to think this is crazy? It's 2022."
She further explained the teacher had not suggested her son was being bullied, just that she was worried he would be. Then she added: "But where does it end? He cuts his hair. Then he can't like rainbows and unicorns. Then he learns he has to shut off his feelings and interests because he doesn't fit the mould.
"I wouldn't have thought having long hair was that unusual either. I also would have thought the teacher might take a bit of responsibility for educating the class about diversity. None of his male or female friends outside of school have bullied him because of his hair."
A number of other parents said their sons also had long hair but had not been bullied, and suggested the school needed to take more action to deal with any incidents.
One said: "My DS has long, curly blonde hair and blue eyes too. Often mistaken for a girl, doesn't care, no issues at school at all (everyone loves his hair). He doesn't care, I only recently persuaded him to have a couple of curls off the bottom because the ends needed tidying up.
"He does have to tie it back for school now it's past his shoulders, but he prefers that to the idea of even cutting it into a bob (let alone actually short). I'd say that if she's worried about bullying, I'd turn that back on the school - why is there bullying in the school based on haircuts for goodness sake."
Another added: "Nephew has always had shoulder length hair throughout primary school and has never been bullied about it. He is a keen footballer and many of his heroes have a similar hairstyle which they tie up for playing."
Has your child been bullied at school? Let us know in the comments below
And one wrote: "What if they were bullied because they didn't have expensive trainers? Or they wear glasses? Ginger hair? Because their mum is fat?"
Some parents said the young boy should keep his long hair if that's what he liked.
"I think if he has very strong feelings about his hair then obviously don't force him to cut it, but make sure it's coming from him not you," said one comment. "Fitting in is really important to kids. Arguably just as important as 'being yourself', so don't underestimate it."
However, one mum said she would want to prevent any bullying and wrote: "I would do anything to stop my child being bullied. If that means shorter hair so be it."
