Lurgan Celtic announced two huge 'signings' on Tuesday, just as the January transfer window was about to close.
Manchester City striker Erling Haaland and Liverpool defender Virgil van Dijk will soon be strutting their stuff in the Mid Ulster League - if he can get in the Celtic team.
The Division 2 outfit made the comical announcements on Tuesday, with club official Gerard Campbell part of the deal to bring Van Dijk to Lurgan Park.
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They even produced a mock photos of Erling and Virgil wearing the club's colours.
Sharing the news on social media, the Hoops said: "Signed!
"The final bit of business today sees Erling Haaland arrive into Lurgan this evening. One of Gerard Campbell’s last actions was to unveil Erling.
"Erling is unlikely to force his way into the team ahead of Reynolds & Withers, so remains hopeful of getting a run of games for the reserves."
Reserve manager Shéa Duffy added: "Erling is that keen to get going and start this Saturday that when I went into the office this morning, he had my breakfast made and waiting, and was busy doing star jumps in the corridor’!
"We’ll see how he goes in training, but he knows he’s on boot cleaning duties this week for the rest of the lads! He’s also been shown the standards Damo has set for him to follow."
Confirming Van Dijk's arrival - which sees Campbell move in the opposite direction - the club said: "Signed! Coming the other way as part of the Campbell deal is Virgil Van Dijk!
"Although not given any assurances on a starting spot he has been offered a complimentary bottle of Buckfast and Station Grill fish supper each Saturday night during his tenure with the club.
"Van Dijk has a big hole to fill vacated by Campbell, but is welcomed to Lurgan with open arms!"
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