I send a charged topspin shot hurtling across the court. The ball is returned - to my wincing displeasure - by Baby Waluigi, a gurning little thug who's capable of surprisingly powerful flat shots. But Mario Tennis Fever's most wretched infant hasn't reckoned on my doubles partner, Birdo, who's stationed at the net and unleashes a Fever Shot that coats the other side of the court in a tsunami of ink. Petey Piranha replies with a Fever Shot of his own, and a volcanic fissure opens up on our side of the net, spewing globs of magma. Birdo is scorched, and we're down fifteen-love.
Now if all that sounds a little chaotic, then let me be clear: a doubles match of Mario Tennis Fever can be pandemonium. At its busiest moments it feels like four opera singers bellowing at each other in a cupboard full of fireworks. Occasionally, the cacophony resolves into something tuneful and pleasant. At other times, well, it's anarchy with rackets.
