We’re three minutes into the latest episode of Love Island and new boy Remi is already rapping. Granted, the Mancunian bombshell was asked to do so by his fellow islanders, but just a few seconds into this impromptu musical moment and it’s clear to everyone, Remi included, that this was a mistake. An awkward, messy mistake. Still, hungry for new blood, the girls – and us viewers at home – are willing to pretend these 10 seconds didn’t happen. And so, we will never speak of Remi’s rapping again.
Elsewhere around the firepit tonight, Jacques squaring up to bombshell Jay yields humiliating results for everyone involved. “So, what do you do, big boy?” asks Jacques, who has done little in the villa to be known for anything other than being Gemma’s ex. Jay replies he works in the ever-vague sector of “finance” before snapping back that Jacques looks a little small to be a rugby player. From there, it’s an inevitable hop, skip and jump to Jacques threatening to “flatten” his new rival in the garden.
Said “flattening” narrowly avoided, the islanders make it to the next day unscathed – which is good, because it’s time for dates. With all the excitement of someone who has never received a text before, Remi and Jay announce to the villa they get to choose three girls to go on a date with (the first will make the starter course, second will make the main course… you get the picture). It’s an apt concept considering how much this season so far has focused on discussing people’s “top three”. Jay chooses Amber, Ekin-Su, and Tasha. While Remi singles out Indiyah, Paige, and Ekin-Su.
The dates go exactly as you’d expect. The boys lay it on thick (remember when “factor 50” was a thing?) and interrogate their lunch companions on exactly how devoted they are to their current partners. The girls repeat the phrase “it’s early days” endlessly. Trust Ekin-Su to dish up some drama, though. As Davide watches in horror from the balcony – wearing two pairs of sunglasses on for “heightened vision”, I might add – Ekin-Su reenacts The Lady and the Tramp spaghetti scene with Jay, before feeding chocolate covered strawberries to Remi.
If this episode has proven anything it’s that Ekin-Su is a gift from the reality TV gods. The Essex actor has stirred up trouble from the get-go, more than earning her place in that villa – and our hearts (for these few months of summer, at least). The preview for Thursday night’s episode confirms her icon status, as we’re treated to a snippet of the 27-year-old literally crawling on her hands and knees to the veranda for a smooch with Jay away from the prying eyes of her Italian Stallion. If this girl doesn’t make it to Casa Amor, we’ll riot.
