A lonely divorcée has compiled her top tips for making friends in ‘later life’ – and now encourages others to “enjoy being single” and “go alone to festivals.”
Chantelle Dyson, 28, started helping women with their loneliness when she ended her seven-year relationship in September 2019 and found herself single at 26.
After realizing she was one of the only single women in her friendship group, she found it hard to adjust to being alone again.
But after finding herself and becoming comfortable in being alone, she became a certified life coach and started a community to bring other single women together.
Now she shares her top tips – encouraging people to go and do something by themselves – and organizes meetups to bring women together.
Dyson, a supply teacher, from Chelmsford, Essex, in southern England, said: “I really struggled when I came out of my marriage because you lose that person that you go to for everything.
“I had been with him my whole adult life, so it was an adjustment and hard because lots of my friends were then all in relationships and starting families.
“But I realized that friendship can be the answer to loneliness.
“I also got more comfortable in myself and doing things by myself.
“Of course, I still love doing things with my friends but if they’re busy with their partners then it shouldn’t stop you going to that concert or having that picnic in the park.”
Dyson created her platform ‘The single girls club’ in April 2021 – and was shocked at the response.
“I wanted to create a place for lots of women like me to have others in a similar position to talk to,” she said.
“It really grew, and we started doing online and then in-person meet-ups.”
It’s been a personal development journey for Dyson too who has found comfort and self-worth in being single.
“I’m not putting pressure on myself to find anyone now,” she said.
“I’m enjoying my best single life.”
Dyson has gone to festivals by herself, traveled around the country to go to gigs and had a picnic in the park by herself.
“It forces you to have some conversations with people if you’re at a festival on your own for example,” she said.
“It’s good to have you time – I’ll also go all out with fairy lights, and snacks for a movie night by myself.
“I try to live life now by thinking: ‘If I died tomorrow would I be happy with my life?’”
Dyson’s top tips to overcome loneliness:
1.Admitting you are lonely to yourself
2.Using journaling and videoing to work out how you are feeling
3.Expressing yourself
4.Making sure you try the new things that interest you and to not have a particular expectation of the outcome
5.Learning to find time alone and enjoy it
Produced in association with SWNS.
