WILL SELF has returned fire in his ongoing feud with Mark Francois, the Tory politician who he clashed with in a stare-off on BBC show Politics Live.
Author Self has written a scathing review of Mark Francois’s self-published memoir Spartan Victory: The Inside Story of the Battle for Brexit, branding it “appallingly written” and saying it “hasn’t been copy-edited at all”.
Self writes in the New European that Francois devotes an “entire section” of his book to their dispute and adds the MP is “still smarting at the imputation”, made on the programme, about the size of his manhood.
“Let me please take this opportunity to apologise: it was rhetoric, Mark — I’ve no idea how big your p***k is, and obviously have no desire at all to find out.” Well, that should calm things down.
Just order some takeout, Vladimir
VLADIMIR PUTIN is in the headlines because of fears Russia might invade Ukraine — but could coronavirus be to blame? Fiona Hill, a British-American ex-foreign policy adviser to Donald Trump, told an Intelligence Squared event last night: “He’s obviously in rather splendid isolation in one of his many offices and dachas,” adding: “We’ve all got stir-crazy and cabin fever.” Host Josh Glancy reflected: “When I get pandemic cabin fever, I order too much pad Thai, Putin threatens to invade Ukraine… that’s the difference between me and Putin.” Us too.
Battle royale over virtual art show
THE Serpentine Gallery has defended itself after art critic Waldemar Januszczak claimed it had “really lost it” with an augmented-reality exhibition featuring the artist KAWS, which is viewable in the gallery as well as in video game Fortnite. The Standard gave the show one star yesterday. “Serpentine’s core mission is to include and empower diverse audiences and champion artists working across technology and community,” a spokesperson told us. Januszczak had said, “Somebody needs to remind it that it’s an art gallery, not a branch of Paperchase.” Welcome to the future?
SW1A
SPEAKING of political memoirs, don’t expect one from Theresa May any time soon. At the launch of new book The Ticket Collector from Belarus by Mike Anderson and Neil Hanson at Coutts bank last night, the former PM told The Londoner: “I don’t like them, I don’t read politicians’ biographies, autobiographies — I’ve got quite enough to do at the moment.” When we asked twice if she has any sympathy for Boris Johnson, who is struggling with Tory MPs as she did, May insisted we should wait for the Sue Gray report. She then turned to thank someone who came to say they missed her time in power. Ever professional.
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PRESENTER Josh Denzel and model Ruby Wong arrived in style at the Jaguar-hosted Nightmare Alley premiere last night, rocking up in a classic car to the showing at Screen on the Green. They were joined by presenter Anita Rani, entrepreneur Niomi Smart and models Scott Staniland and Sophia Hadjipanteli.
