"Walk in my shoes for a good few years and come back and see me."
These are the words of Chloe Meadows, a 24-year-old trans woman from the Rhondda. Her message is off the back of years of bullying and abuse she has faced for being herself.
Chloe always knew she was Chloe - from as young as age two or three. When she was a child she always questioned why she didn't have long hair like her friends but she said it wasn't until she was an adult that she gained the understanding of her feelings and the confidence to start living her true self.
Read more: Woman who hated clothes now loves them after losing five stone and halving her dress size
Chloe has been living as a woman for four years and has been on hormone therapy for the last three years. Her story is one that has been told many times before. One of growing up with bullies and followed with abuse into adulthood.
But Chloe doesn't care anymore. She wants her bullies to know that she is not Thomas anymore. She wants to show people that she won't let their nasty comments and trolling get to her.
"I want to show people now it doesn't matter who you are, we are all meant to have a place in this world and you should be loved."
Chloe was 20 years old when she first sought hormone therapy to embark on her transition. The care worker from Trebanog described the process as long and hard, undergoing repeated mental health assessments before she finally chose to pay privately as the waiting was having a negative impact on her mental health.
The process hasn't been easy though, and it has taken her a few years to gain her confidence. She credits a staggering four-stone weight loss in 11 months through Slimming World as aiding her confidence, and also allowing her to pursue gender reassignment surgery.
"It was bad at first when I first came out, people would say to me you can't use the women's toilets because you are not a woman. One person said to me you are a man in drag. Now I don't get as much abuse. I have gained confidence as a woman but have gained more confidence since joining Slimming World. I am the only trans woman in the group.
"When I was talking with the girls in the Slimming World group I said I can't wait to have a designer vagina and one woman said what do you mean and I explained I am a trans woman and she said she would never have known. It made me feel accepted, it makes me feel really happy and I had to lose weight for the surgery as before I would not have been considered for it. I enjoy nights out now. Before I would have photos with my friends and hide myself at the back but now I don't feel the need to do that."
"I have booked my first ever girls holiday this year and I can't wait," Chloe said. "Before I would not go out of the house. I have gone from a size 22-24 to a size 16. I never thought I would get down to that size.
"It is amazing shopping but I have still got to remind myself not to look at the back of the rack for the big sizes and to see my size towards the front. I just find it staggering being able to go to H&M and be like I can fit into anything.
"And I love working out now - I didn't used to at all. Even in school I used to give the teachers notes excusing me from PE written by my parents but it was me. I love doing home workouts, going out walking, it has made me feel like a much better person."
In total, Chloe has lost four stone and two pounds. Before she joined Slimming World she said her diet would consist of food like takeaways, burgers and kebabs. Her usual day before she started her weight loss journey would consist of a full English breakfast, or white bread toasted with lots of butter or a chocolatey cereal like cocoa pops.
Now, following the Slimming World plan, for breakfast she still enjoys a cooked breakfast but eats reduced fat sausage and bacon cooked in low calorie cooking spray as opposed to oil. She has also swapped her usual takeaway dinners for homemade foods, making her own burgers using 5% fat mince beef.
She also enjoys making soups using what Slimming World describes as speed food - certain vegetables - and loves adding swede to mash potato. One of Chloe's tips to make creamy mash instead of adding butter is to add an egg. She also swears by her Ninja Air Fryer. Chloe attends Nicola Jones' Slimming World class in Porth Plaza at 11am on a Thursday morning. She credits Nicola with helping her feel welcome and achieving her weight loss goal.
Now that she is in a healthy weight band to qualify for surgery, she is hoping to receive her first referral letter from the surgeon in February. In the meantime she is happy and content with her newfound confidence.
Read next:
- What it's really like working in A&E at a critical time for the NHS
- Woman addresses 'embarrassing' issue many face after having children
- How to be a better ally to the trans community
- 'I'd been overweight for 26 years and tried everything but this is how I lost six stone'
- 'Conversion therapy made me leave my family but now I'm thriving'
