Polly Toynbee raises an interesting point about class and how we perceive ourselves and how others perceive us throughout our lives (Take it from me (and Keir Starmer) – you should never pretend to be more working class than you are, 26 September). Inevitably, however, this opens a whole can of worms, given the vast amount of scenarios that arise when one interrogates one’s own family tree.
While we concentrate on moving up the social scale, does the same happen in reverse? My maternal grandfather was born into a cotton mill-owning family in 1886, but the decline of said industry meant that his children trained and worked in occupations that may be considered working class. Was that seen as a decline in their fortunes? Certainly not by my mother and her siblings, who strove to do the best with the resources available, and allowed my siblings, cousins and I to have greater opportunity than they did.
Does that now make me middle class? Maybe, but it does not mean one forgets one’s origins and so, hopefully, ensures one remains empathetic to those who haven’t been so fortunate.
Michael Thornton
Horsham, West Sussex
• Polly Toynbee is right about the need for honesty about class origins. Apart from the hypocrisy, there is a more damaging consequence – people occupying positions of power that could actually go to a person with a genuine working-class background. There is another problematic dishonesty too, which comes with the shame of growing up very poor.
In my first job after leaving university, I was taken out to lunch and someone mentioned “The kind of kids who grew up on council estates”. I replied: “You mean people like me.” I almost didn’t say it for fear of being judged. I have let classist comments go at times when people have made common cause assuming I share their middle-class background.
Growing up on a council estate, living in temporary accommodation, visiting pawnshops to get money for bills and seeing parental despair brought about by poverty shame, doesn’t imbue huge amounts of self-confidence, no matter how far you travel.
I was very lucky to work for a CEO from the same background. He knew how to build confidence when there were moments of doubt because he understood my psychology. It’s another reason why we need working-class people in positions of power who can proudly talk about their background and nurture working-class talent.
Caroline O’Dwyer
London
• I enjoyed Polly Toynbee’s piece. I could claim working-class credentials. I was raised in a council house by a mineworker father and a hospital auxiliary mother. But, thanks to a good, free education, I landed a white-collar job and progressed up the ranks. One day, at Sunday lunch with my parents, I was telling a story about some discussion at work where I had pronounced that I was working class and proud of it.
My father cut me to the quick, saying: “No! You’re middle class and I’m proud of it.” While I am proud of my working-class routes, I am grateful for my middle-class status and all the privilege that has allowed me to bestow on my own children. There’s no shame in social mobility, let’s celebrate it and champion opportunity for all.
Name and address supplied
• What is the embarrassment in being middle class? I’m middle class and proud that my parents (both from working class backgrounds themselves) worked hard to help my brother and myself get a good state education and consequent professional jobs. What really matters is not what advantages or disadvantages you start off with, but what do you with them – do you use them for self-centred personal aggrandisement or channel them for the greater good of society?
Maggie Hamilton
Oxford
• Have an opinion on anything you’ve read in the Guardian today? Please email us your letter and it will be considered for publication in our letters section.
