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We Got This Covered
We Got This Covered
David James

Laura Loomer calls Governor Newsom a ‘fat slob.’ In turn, he tells America she eats dog food. Literally

Whoever’s running Gavin Newsom‘s official press office account isn’t taking any prisoners. In a refreshing change for decorum-obsessed Democrats, Newsom and his staff have been let off the leash lately, every day finding new ways to aggressively mock, needle, and poke fun at their MAGA opponents.

Now, once again, failed Batman villain and Trump whisperer Laura Loomer has tried to come at them, and has slunk away with her tail between her legs. Honestly, that’s the best way to put it, because you’ll soon understand why Loomer’s bark is worse than her bite. So to speak.

Anyhow, this messy bit of drama began when Loomer came for the governor of Illinois, JB Pritzker, who posted on X, “Trump is a racist”. Given that this came at the end of a day in which Trump was universally criticized for posting a video depicting Barack and Michelle Obama as monkeys, it’s a fair point to make.

Loomer rushed to Trump’s defense, mustering the sharp wit she’s renowned for:

Oscar Wilde would be proud. Gavin Newsom’s press office then leapt into the arena, pointing out a simple fact:

Woof. Newsom’s team isn’t wrong. In Sept. 2024, Loomer was clearly ready to promote whatever was on offer for a quick buck, including dog food supplement Pawsitive, which is apparently made from delicious bison organs. To showcase its deliciousness, she reached into the pouch, grabbed some of the dog food, and ate it.

Mmm, organs

Reports of her developing a glossy coat and then running in circles around the lounge chasing her tail are, sadly, unconfirmed.

Another wrinkle in the story emerged when Derek Guy – X’s “Menswear guy”, claimed that this was all a prank that he’d orchestrated in an attempt to make Loomer eat dog food on camera:

If true, it would have been an all-timer prank. However, Pawsitive dog food supplements are indeed real, so it seems that he’s pulling our legs.

Either way, the fact remains that Newsom (or his social media team) is 100% correct that Loomer ate dog food. Just remember, if you’re cornered by Loomer, the best move is to grab a nearby stick, wave it in front of her face until she’s focused on it, then hurl it away from you as far as you can. By the time she runs back with it clutched between her teeth, you’ll be long gone.

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