DALLAS — Unlike LIV Golf — which tees off Thursday outside London — most upstart leagues aren’t backed by the Saudi government, which murdered/dismembered a journalist and executes people because of their sexual orientation at will. Phil Mickelson’s words, by the way, not mine. The numbers back him up, though. Eighty-one executions on a single day in March. According to watchdog groups, some were killed for participating in human rights demonstrations.
Anyway, Lefty will tee off Thursday, suggesting he’s made amends with his new employers since his controversial remarks. Either that or he’s a light sleeper.
Besides Phil, the 48-man field at Centurion Club co-stars Dustin Johnson and then it’s a fairly steep drop-off to Louis Oosthuizen, Kevin Na, Talor Gooch, Sergio Garcia, Martin Kaymer, Charl Schwartzel, Lee Westwood and Ian Poulter. Unless you’ve brushed up on your international golf, that sentence probably constitutes everyone you’d recognize this week.
Closest ties to Texas: Justin Harding, a 36-year-old South African who played at Lamar, and Wade Ormsby, 41, a Houston Cougar from Australia billed as “the strongest man on the Asian Tour!”
No Scottie Scheffler.
No Jordan Spieth.
No Will Zalatoris.
Pretty much, no American golfer under the age of 37 who’s won much of anything or has any hope of ever winning anything, either. Because Jay Monahan, commissioner of the PGA Tour, has threatened lifetime bans on fence-jumpers. Most of the rebels took the threats so seriously, they actually resigned from the Tour. But not Phil. He’s apparently calling the bluff, as Phil is wont to do.
For the record: This week’s news conferences have been awkward for golfers and officials alike. Asked if they were guilty of “sportswashing,” or helping the Saudi government whitewash its international reputation through a golf tournament, several golfers played dumber than usual. At least once it got heated. An LIV spokesperson cut off an AP reporter’s question, arguing loudly that he wasn’t being “polite,” and had him removed by security. As an ESPN reporter felt compelled to tweet, this was “not a joke.”
Fortunately, the reporter shortly returned, which isn’t always a given, right, Phil?
The reason most of the Tour’s elite as well as its rank-and-file weren’t swayed by the lure of huge bonuses and deluxe accommodations is because the Tour pays pretty well, too, and you don’t wake up in the middle of the night wondering if Phil knew what he was talking about. No matter how much money the Saudi-backed tour boasts, with Johnson reportedly earning a $125 million signing bonus, there’s also no guarantee they’ll keep pouring millions into it annually. Especially if DJ and Lefty are the only headliners. Only Texas football boosters pay big money year after year for anything less than the best.
Leagues come and go all the time across the sports landscape, and they almost always belly up because they can’t attract enough stars or run out of money or interest. Everyone said it’d be different the XFL’s second time around if only because of Vince McMahon’s billions. Not even a full season into the redux of the “He Hate Me” league? Poof.
Chances are, unless LIV Golf comes up with a dozen or more marquee names than it has going for it right now, it might not last more than a solitary season, either. And if you’ve been banned by the Tour, what do you do then? If you’re Dustin Johnson, still just 37, what do you do?
I mean, other than count your $125 million?
Tiger Woods wouldn’t take the money, not even when it amounted to what Greg Norman, Grand Poobah of LIV Golf, called the “mind-blowingly enormous” sum of nearly $1 billion. The Saudis’ money didn’t mean anything to Tiger because he’s already worth billions, and he’s not about making money anymore. He’s out to make history. He’s not taking any chances on his eligibility for majors. He knows he can’t chase Jack Nicklaus on the LIV tour, though, if you believe Norman, Tiger could have at least hung out with Nicklaus if the Golden Bear hadn’t reneged on his $100 million LIV offer.
Without Scheffler and Spieth and Zalatoris and Tiger and the Bear, LIV Golf is left with a field this week that isn’t as good as the Nelson’s worst. And even those fallow years out at the Four Seasons, you weren’t risking the wrath of a global community or a lifetime ban. Just a heat stroke between holes.
Of course, good or bad, Phil is always good TV. Speaking of which, despite claims of a major broadcaster in the works, if you want to watch the rebels go at it this week, you’ll have to do it on Facebook, YouTube or LIV’s official website. No, it won’t be the same.
No Jim Nantz purring into the microphone.
No Verne Lundquist barking, “Yes, sir!”
No David Feherty cracking you up.
Given the circumstances, maybe it’s best that it won’t look or sound normal this week. Because there’s nothing normal about it at all. Let’s hope it remains that way.
